


Always on the run (need to go away)

by Vicky



Category: Doctor Who (2005), Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Angst, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-17
Updated: 2013-08-17
Packaged: 2017-12-23 19:04:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 26,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/929999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vicky/pseuds/Vicky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the run from her life, River turned to her childhood friend to stand back on her own two feet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Ghosts of the Past](https://archiveofourown.org/works/496318) by [Vicky](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vicky/pseuds/Vicky). 



> This is a sequel to The Ghosts of the Past, written for last year's heroinebigbang, so I'd suggest you read that one first if you haven't already. Many thanks to my beta, csiangel and to my artist, whogate who made this great art ([here](http://whogate.livejournal.com/5935.html)).

Hearing her childhood nickname – the one only her parents and Melody used – coming from the lips of a woman she had seen for the first time the day before knocked the breath out of Elizabeth's lungs.

It just wasn't possible that this woman was speaking the truth. But in the light of what she had remembered from the day before, and the use of her childhood nickname, she knew it was real, that the woman standing in the Gateroom could only really be Melody.

And Elizabeth had come to learn in the past few years that anything was possible in the Pegasus Galaxy. But it didn't prevent her from saying the exact opposite.

"It's impossible."

"Oh, believe me, she's quite impossible," the Doctor said. "She should be, what with being the daughter of the Last Centurion and mad, impossible Pond. She's just a _Pond_."

"Shut up, Sweetie."

River could see that none of her husband's antics was amusing the people in the room. They probably couldn't even understand what he was saying. He was just trying to help – bless him – but it just didn't make any sense for these people. She kept looking at Elizabeth and she saw that she still wasn't ready to believe her. She would have to convince her, but knowing her like she did, even after all these years, River knew it couldn't happen here.

"Can we maybe talk somewhere more private?" she asked.

"Alright," Elizabeth replied. "Let's go to the briefing room."

"One more thing. Amy and Rory might come out looking for us, if you can ask your people not to shoot them..."

"They won't," John assured River.

The Doctor and River entered the briefing room, followed by Elizabeth and John. The door closed behind them, shutting them out of the view and earshot of the people in the control room. River turned towards the two Lanteans while her husband walked further into the room, taking a seat at the head of the table. He probably knew, just as much as River did that it was Elizabeth's usual chair, but by sitting right there – just like he sat in President Nixon's chair in the Oval Office – he was showing them that he didn't care who was in charge. She had no doubt that, under the right circumstances, the people under Elizabeth's command could draw their guns too. And just like the President's secret service, they were Americans. She wouldn't say that to her husband though; where would be the fun if she did?

"I believe you would need proof that I'm saying the truth," River said, turning back towards Elizabeth who nodded at her. "Alright. We didn't go to your office because it wouldn't offer you enough privacy. Sure, you can close the door so that no one can hear what we're saying, but that's not enough for you. People could still see us through the glass walls, and given what has happened when we arrived, people would watch. So, we're here, secluded from the rest of Atlantis, where you can feel safe."

"That's good," Elizabeth said after a moment. "But it can just mean that you're a good profiler, not that you are who you pretend to be."

River had known that her little explanation about why she chose the briefing room wouldn't convince Elizabeth. And she hadn't said all that to convince her, but rather to show her, that even though a lot of time had gone by, she still understood her. Not that it mattered right now, when Elizabeth didn't want to trust her, but with time, it would.

"What do you want me to tell you, then?" River asked, although she knew what Elizabeth wanted.

"Something only Melody could know."

River didn't have to think too long to know what she would tell Elizabeth. A long suppressed memory came to her mind almost instantly.

"We were twelve and it was New Year's Eve. It was late, we were in your room, looking at the stars. You were wondering what was out there, and I replied that one day, I'd find out and tell you all about it. You said that maybe, you'd come with me." She paused for a moment, watching Elizabeth's eyes fill with tears. "And look where we are now. You were right, Elizabeth: we're both travelling the stars."

River stopped talking, and silence fell in the room. She kept looking at Elizabeth, and was able to pinpoint the exact moment her childhood friend accepted what she told her as the truth.

"It's really you, Melody," Elizabeth breathed.

"Yeah."

John's stance considerably relaxed when Elizabeth said those words. As a trained warrior herself, River had felt the tension radiating from his body since they arrived. He had been ready to protect Elizabeth should the need had arisen. But now that he knew River to be who she said she was, he could stand down.

"How is it possible? They shot you. You were dying."

"That's actually the key word: dying. I wasn't dead, I was dying. See, the Doctor is a Time Lord and I'm..." she paused, trying to find the correct term to describe herself.

"A Time Lady?" John intervened, and River smiled.

"No, not really. Sweetie, do you want to explain?" she asked, turning towards her husband.

"Alright. Amy and Rory are one hundred percent human, so she should have been human too. But she was conceived when the TARDIS was in the Time Vortex, which gave her Time Lord DNA. She's as much Amy and Rory's daughter as she is the TARDIS'."

"With my DNA, I was the perfect weapon against the Doctor," River continued, knowing that the Doctor didn't like thinking about this. "I couldn't die, I would have just regenerated, just like the Doctor."

"And that's what you did when you were shot: you regenerated," Elizabeth interrupted her.

"Yeah."

"When you said that you were the 'perfect weapon', what did you...?" John trailed off, not sure that he wanted this question answered.

"They abducted Amy when she was pregnant with me. I was born in the future, on Demon's run. The Doctor and Rory managed to find where we were, and he built his own little army to come and get us. During the battle of Demon's run, they stole me, and brought me to the past. I first grew up in an orphanage in Florida, though it wasn't the version of me you knew. When I was about 8, I was sick and dying, and I regenerated in an alley in New York. People found me and brought me to safety."

She knew better than to try to explain that she and the Doctor were actually the ones who found her baby self, not even an hour before for them. That would only lead to a headache for all the people present.

"I grew up to be the one you used to know, Elizabeth," she just said, not wanting to get into details, and sure that Elizabeth had already told John everything he needed to know. "When I regenerated again as a toddler, they took me to Leadworth and I grew up as Amy and Rory's best friend, even though they didn't know who I was to them, obviously. Except for when I was in New York, Madame Kovarian and the Church always had their eyes on me. I was conditioned to kill the Doctor when given the opportunity. But Amy and Rory, and the Doctor himself, helped me understand that he wasn't the man I was taught about."

"Melody...," Elizabeth started, but River interrupted her by raising a hand.

"Please, don't call me Melody anymore. Melody was the woman who was trained to kill the Doctor." _And succeeded_ , she added in her mind. "I'm not that person anymore."

Elizabeth nodded; she could understand the need River had to dissociate her present-self from a previous version of herself, and she would certainly respect her wish. It would take some getting used to, but the fact that, even though River had her childhood best friend's memories, she looked different would certainly help.

There was still one question Elizabeth needed answered. She already had an idea as to what the answer would be, but she had to ask anyway.

"Why didn't you tell me the truth when we were alone?"

River knew that this question would come sooner rather than later. Elizabeth had always wanted to get answers, even more so when she was involved. So it was no surprise that she demanded to know everything in this situation.

But even though she had anticipated the question, River didn't know how to answer it. She wasn't sure Elizabeth would understand what had gone through River's mind when she introduced herself. Still, if her parents had taught her only one thing, it was to be as honest as one could, and this time, she thought that a lie would hurt her old friend more than the truth.

"At first, I wasn't sure you were remembering me, and what happened."

"But I do. And you knew I did when we were confronted with that machine."

"Yeah… It's just… Amy, Rory and the Doctor didn't know about this regeneration. No one knew because I never told them. Many times, I tried to forget, but I never really could. But I couldn't bring myself to tell them about these years in New York. About you. Until today, when I had no choice but to tell them."

"Why did you keep it to yourself?" Elizabeth asked.

"Because it hurt just to think about it. For more than a decade, not only was I free from Madame Kovarian and the Church, but I had people who cared about me. And all of this had been taken away from me in a matter of hours. And I put you in danger. I did it again yesterday."

"Don't…"

"It's true," River interrupted her before she could go any further. "If we hadn't been here, you would have never managed to activate the machine, and you would have been safe."

"Rodney would have probably found a way, and he would have been insufferable about it," John cut in, making the other three smile.

"John's right. Rodney would have figured it out, and we would have been in the same situation, without you here." Elizabeth paused, biting her bottom lip, before resuming. "Why did you change your mind about telling me?"

"Something happened. Don't ask me what, I won't say," River added, knowing that would have been Elizabeth's next question. "I just had a chance to change it all, but I realised that I didn't want to change anything, not one line. And that includes the time we spent together."

She wasn't lying; there was a time when she would have given everything to be able to grow up with her parents. But she had understood, long ago, that the changes it would imply would be too important. She didn't know what would have happened if she hadn't been her parents' best friends and played matchmaker at just the right moment. And there was this part of her who didn't want to let go of this decade of normalcy she had spent in New York, and the bond she had had with Elizabeth.

"There's one more thing I want you to know. The TARDIS thought that it was time for us to meet again. We let her decide the destination, and she took us where you were."

"She's sentient?" John asked, wondering if, on some level, the TARDIS and Atlantis were alike.

"She is, but it's even more than that," the Doctor replied. "She has her own personality, she's alive. She quite often takes control and take us to where we need to be."

"Without the TARDIS, we may never have seen each other again," River continued

"And I would still think you're dead."

River nodded, taking a step closer to Elizabeth. She grabbed her hand, and squeezed it. The brunette looked down at their hands, before looking back up at her friend. If she didn't know that the woman before her was her childhood friend, Elizabeth would never have guessed; she looked so different than Melody, except for her eyes. She still had the same eyes, and Elizabeth wondered why she hadn't noticed them before. But then, she hadn't expected to find someone from her past here in another galaxy.

"Now that you know my story, why don't you tell me yours? What are you doing, not only on another planet, but also in another galaxy?"

"It's a long story."

"I bet it is. But we have time now."

The women smiled at each other, and Elizabeth was about to talk when her radio buzzed. She held up her hand in apology, and pressed the button.

"Yes, Rodney?"

"The blue box is here. In the Gateroom."

"I know Rodney. And it's the TARDIS, not the 'blue box'," she added, rolling her eyes. The Doctor and River Song are here with us, in the briefing."

"How long are they going to stay? I'd like to take some readings..."

"You will do none of that, Rodney. They're our guests."

"But this is a technology..."

"Leave it alone, McKay," John intervened; he had only been privy to Elizabeth's side of the conversation, but he had no doubt what Rodney had been asking about.

"But..."

"Rodney!" Elizabeth cut him before he could start again.

"I should probably go keep an eye on him," John said, turning off his radio.

"I'll come with you," the Doctor offered, getting up from his chair. "Maybe I could give you a tour."

"Sweetie..." River started, but the Doctor was already out of the room; he could move fast when he wanted to. "I swear to god, if you leave without me, I'll kill you!" she shouted, surprising the people in the control room and Elizabeth, who raised an eyebrow. "He left me behind, a couple of times. Once when I was being shot at."

"Well, even if he does leave you behind, you're safe here," Elizabeth replied with a smile. "Why don't we continue this conversation outside?"

"Lead the way."

River followed Elizabeth out of the room. People in the control room were looking at them, still wondering who seemed to have gained their leaders' trust. A glance at the lower level told River that the men were already inside the TARDIS. She wasn't really worried that the TARDIS would leave without her, but after all, she never really knew what could happen.

They stepped onto the balcony, and River breathed in the fresh ocean air. She walked towards the railing and looked at the view displayed before her eyes. She had seen quite a lot in her years of travelling, but she had never seen anything like this before.

"This is breathtaking."

"Even though I've been living here for more than three years now, this view still steals my breath away. I hope this feeling will never go away."

River nodded, understanding what Elizabeth was feeling.

They stayed silent for a long moment. The sound of the waves crashing against the city was the only thing breaking the silence. Contrary to what they had both expected, it wasn't an awkward silence, but a comfortable one, like what they were used to, so many years ago. They remembered hours spent together, not talking, but just looking at the sky and the stars, or reading side by side. Just being together had been enough for them at the time, and now that they found each other again, they easily fell back to their old habits.

Elizabeth knew though that, if when they were children, they had all the time in the world, today, she could be called away for an emergency at any minute. They couldn't waste any more time to get to know each other again.

"I think it all started that day I saw you getting shot to save my life," Elizabeth started to talk, her voice barely above a whisper as she remembered the events of that day.

"Why is that?" River asked, surprised.

"I saw a therapist for a few years after it happened. He made me talk about my feelings, like any therapist would do in that case. It was in his office that I first said that I believed that words could be more powerful weapons than actual firearms. "

"The Doctor feels this way too," River said, cutting in. "He's not a warrior, although he can turn into one if you so much as threaten the people he cares about."

"I can understand that. I cross the line sometimes too, even though I'm never the one holding the gun. Anyway, it was again in his office where I decided to become a diplomat in the first place. I spent a few years bringing warring parties to the table and brokering treaties all over the world. Then, one day, our diplomatic mission had been caught in crossfire between two warring tribes in Africa. I saw one of my colleagues being shot in the head. He fell right beside me."

Elizabeth paused; if she closed her eyes, she knew she could see it happening again behind her eyelids. It was one of those things you couldn't ever forget, even though you wished it was possible to. River took her hand and squeezed it, just as she had done before in the briefing room. She wished she could just hug her, but it wasn't time for that yet; they were just learning to know each other again.

Elizabeth squeezed back, opening her eyes to look at River. They smiled at each other; at that precise moment, they knew that while it might take time, they could find that affinity they had as children once again.

"I hurt my knee pretty badly during this attack, and when I came back to the States, I was on medical leave for a couple of months. One of my former teachers at Georgetown asked me to teach a few political science classes during that time, and I ended up staying."

"You needed a change of scenery after what happened."

"Yes. I was still at Georgetown when the President asked me to come to the White House where he told me all about the Stargate Program. It was probably the strangest appointment I ever had as you can imagine."

"Oh believe me, I understand that. But maybe President Nixon would understand you even better. It's a long story for another time," River added at the look Elizabeth was giving her. "We'll have plenty of time for that later."

"I think I'd like to hear this one. So, President Hayes appointed me as the civilian commander of the Stargate Command, in Cheyenne Mountain, replacing General Hammond. You can guess that my replacing their beloved commander wasn't seen as positively as the President had hoped. During that time when I was at the SGC, one of the teams, SG-1, found an Ancient outpost in Antarctica. I left the SGC in General O'Neill's good hands, and went to Antarctica to survey the research on Atlantis, the lost City of the Ancients. We finally found a gate address for it, and here we are," she concluded, gesturing for the City around them.

She left out many parts of the story, not because she didn't think River would understand – she actually thought that she might be the only outsider who could understand the whole story – but because she knew they would have time to revisit the story later.

"Was Plato's story actually right?" River asked, the archaeologist in her demanding to know.

"Everything he wrote about was accurate," Elizabeth nodded. "He just didn't know that it had happened in a galaxy far, far away," she added with a smile, knowing that her friend would get the reference.

"Good one," River approved. "But does that mean that Atlantis had sunk in the ocean?"

"Yes. When we first arrived here, it was still underwater. The Ancients had submerged it to protect it from the Wraith's attacks."

"Ah yes. I believe it was your friend Teyla who told the Doctor about them. These life-sucking alien vampires sound pretty dangerous."

"They are. We lost good people to them."

"I'm sorry," River said when she saw that Elizabeth was saddened by those deaths.

"It comes with being their leader. I sometimes feel like I send them all to their death when they walk through the Gate."

"You can't think like that, Elizabeth. They chose to come here, and they knew beforehand that it would be dangerous, didn't they?"

"Yes."

"From what I understood, you're at war with two different enemies, and with war comes death. You don't have to be alright with that, but you have to accept that you're doing everything you can to protect them. It's not your fault when they don't come back."

"You speak like a true warrior," Elizabeth said.

"I did tell you that I was raised like this. But that doesn't mean I don't react the way you do sometimes. I had the chance to have Amy and Rory, and even the Doctor in some way, to teach me to be caring. I just know that sometimes, there's nothing you can do to stop something from happening. You just have to accept it."

Elizabeth nodded, swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat. She knew that River was right, and it wasn't the first time she was the recipient of such a speech; John, Teyla and even Ronon told her as much in the past. But knowing it to be true didn't help her come to terms with it. Even after three years spent in the Pegasus Galaxy, she couldn't stop thinking like the diplomat she had been and she still was in some way, the diplomat who put her faith in words instead of weapons. And she held onto that dearly, because she knew that if she ever let it go, she would lose herself completely.

River might not be a mind reader, but she had known Elizabeth enough in the past to understand what was going on in her mind. There was nothing she could do to help her; Elizabeth had to figure everything out by herself. It wouldn't happen in an instant, and River knew that what her friend needed at the moment was to think about something else.

"How are your parents?"

"Dad died when I was just finishing my first PhD," she replied, pausing to let River absorb this information.

"I'm so sorry," River replied, feeling sad about the man who had wanted to adopt her just before Madame Kovarian found her again.

"Mom still lives in the same house, and she's doing really well. She's going to be happy to know that you're alive."

"No, Elizabeth, you can't tell her. Look, does your mom know what you're really doing?" she asked before Elizabeth could protest.

"No... No, she doesn't. Everything is classified, and I can't tell her."

"Then, how can you explain that I didn't die, and that I look so different from the little girl she knew?"

River was right, and Elizabeth knew it; there was no way she could tell her mother about River without having to explain everything. And she wasn't allowed to do that. It would be just another secret that she had to keep from her mother. She wasn't happy about it, but she knew that she had no choice.

"I'm just glad to know that she's well. Your parents meant a lot to me, Elizabeth. Just like you were the first child of my age to show me some interest, they were the first adults, outside of my social worker, who I knew truly cared about me. I would have felt lucky to be part of your family."

"But you wouldn't change a thing from your past."

"No. And it wouldn't just change me, but it would change you too. Would you be here if it wasn't for what happened?" River asked, even though she already knew the answer.

"Probably not," Elizabeth admitted. "See, this is what I told you when you first told me about time travel: there's always the risk of doing something that would change the world as we know it," she said, and they shared a smile.

"Alright. I know I can't convince you to travel through time and space with me, but what about visiting the TARDIS? I promise we won't go anywhere."

"I'm actually really curious about this whole bigger on the inside phenomenon you talked about yesterday."

"Then, let's go," River said as she pushed away from the railing, quickly followed by Elizabeth, to go back inside. "I have to say that I'm quite relieved to see the TARDIS is still here."

"Did you really think he could leave without you?" Elizabeth asked as they walked down the stairs after she informed Chuck of where she was going.

"You don't know him as well as I do," she answered, all the while knowing that it would be true for anyone: no one knew the Doctor as well as she did, it came with her training. "At times, the Doctor has the attention span of a five year old. And it's probably an understatement," she said, snapping her fingers as they neared the TARDIS. "If something interesting catches his eyes, he'll go investigate, even if that means leaving his wife behind on a planet infested with Sontarans."

"Oh come on, I made it up to you!" the man in question exclaimed as he rounded the console.

"That you did," River replied with a smile, remembering how thorough his apology had been.

The Doctor blushed, as that had been River's intention when she said this. The real meaning behind her words hadn't been lost on Elizabeth, John and Rodney either, and the former smiled while the latter two looked anywhere but at River.

"You've already finished your tour?"

"We haven't left the control room yet," John answered River's question. "McKay had _a lot_ of questions," he added, sending a glare the scientist's way.

"This is a technology we've never seen before, and excuse me if I think we can learn a lot from it."

"Well, we'll leave you boys to it," River cut in, recognizing as well as Elizabeth could a situation that could rapidly escalate to a full blown argument. "I'm going to show Elizabeth around. But first, can I borrow the sonic, sweetie?"

"What for?" he asked, handing it to her at the same time.

"Thank you. Give me your radio, Elizabeth," she asked, then. "See, your people can't contact you even though the TARDIS is standing right before their eyes. But if I tweak this just a bit," she added, choosing the right setting, and pointing the sonic screwdriver at Elizabeth's radio. "There you go. Now, there's no problem anymore. I suggest you do the same with their radios," she told the Doctor as she handed the screwdriver and the radio back to their respective owners.

Linking her arm through Elizabeth, she led her towards the stairs; she would keep the control room for last, as she was certain that science still wasn't Elizabeth's favourite subject. First, there was a particular room she wanted to show Elizabeth.

"It's not just 'bigger on the inside'," Elizabeth said, as she was led through different corridors. "It's huge."

"The TARDIS can generate any room you want or she thinks you might need. There's literally a room for everything you can think of. Including this," she said, pushing open the doors of the library. "This is my favourite room in the TARDIS. It has every book you can think of and more."

River stopped there, leaving Elizabeth some time to grasp what she was seeing. From the corner of her eyes, she could see the book on the History of the Time War. She knew what it contained, even though she had never opened it. The Doctor had warned her once against reading it, and even though she was curious, she respected his wish. She had seen it in his eyes that he was serious when he said that it might be dangerous, and she trusted him. She would be told one day, it just wasn't the right time yet.

Elizabeth was facing the biggest library she had ever seen. Even the library at Georgetown would seem small compared to this one. There were several levels, and as far as her eyes could see, there were books everywhere. If she had to take a guess, she would say that the shelves were holding thousands and thousands of books. Every book that was ever written was probably there. She could read books that had been published centuries ago or books that hadn't been published yet. She could probably read books coming from other planets too.

Maybe she could...

"Is there an index somewhere?" Elizabeth asked River, turning towards her.

"I'm not sure," she answered; come to think of it, she had never thought about looking for an index before, she had always just picked up a book at random. "Are you looking for a book in particular?"

"I was wondering if there were any books about Atlantis. When the Ancients lived in the City, I mean," she clarified, not wanting to read anything that pertained to the future of her City.

"I guess we could ask the Doctor... Or just take the books the TARDIS provides us with," she finished when she saw books appearing on a table a few feet away from them. "Shall we?"

They made their way to the table, Elizabeth eager to see what information she would find about Atlantis in these books.

 

###

 

When River and Elizabeth made it back to the control room after a few stops to others rooms – that included the swimming-pool, one of the many gardens and the wardrobe –, the Doctor, John and Rodney were back too. John was the first to notice the couple of books Elizabeth was carrying.

"You're taking a little souvenir?" he asked.

"These are some books about Atlantis that were in the library. River said I could borrow them, and that the TARDIS agreed," she added for the Doctor.

"Of course. I didn't even know I had them."

"Sweetie, you barely know what you have in your pockets sometimes."

"That's... true, but..." He trailed off, knowing that he couldn't end that sentence in a way that was good for him. Instead, he clapped his hands together and turned towards the three Lanteans. "Did you enjoy the visit?"

"It's a really beautiful ship that you have here," John replied sincerely to which Elizabeth and Rodney – who had his head in the notes he had taken during the tour – nodded.

"We should probably go, now," River said. "We're keeping you away from your duties."

"Can't you stay just a few hours more?" Elizabeth asked. "We could return the favour and take you on a tour of Atlantis. There's plenty to see there too."

"I have no doubt there is, Elizabeth. We'll be back for this tour. I'll come back, I promise," she said, wanting to reassure her friend that it wasn't goodbye.

Elizabeth nodded, understanding and knowing that River was right. She had reports to read and a couple of briefings to attend, and she was sure that the Doctor and River had some place to be too. Beckoning John closer, she handed him the books she was holding and turned back towards River.

Taking a step forward, she hugged her, knowing that the gesture had to come from her. River hugged her just as tightly, and tears prickled their eyes as it soon turned familiar, as if no time at all had passed since they had last been able to do that. When they released each other, River grabbed Elizabeth's hands, keeping her close.

"I'm glad we found each other again," River said.

"Me too. And remember, you're welcome to come whenever you want, both of you," Elizabeth added, looking at the Doctor who nodded in agreement. "And your parents are welcome too, of course. I'm looking forward to meeting them."

"I know for sure that they're looking forward to meeting you too."

"See you soon, then."

"Very soon, I hope."

Elizabeth squeezed River's hands one last time before releasing them. She walked towards John and Rodney, who were waiting for her by the door, having already said their goodbyes. She made a move to take the books back from John, but he shook his head no. Rodney opened the door, and with one last look towards the Doctor and River, she stepped out of the TARDIS.

While Rodney went straight to the labs to share what he had learned with Zelenka, John and Elizabeth stayed in the Gateroom, standing a couple of feet away from the blue box. As the ship started to dematerialise before their eyes, John's hand found Elizabeth's.

"We will see them again," John whispered, reassuring her.

"I know."

She had no doubt about that, but she didn't know when that would be. The Doctor and River were time travellers, but from what her friend had told her the day before, they didn't travel together all the time. It might be a while before they came back here, in between two of their adventures. But even if a lot of time passed before they saw each other again, it would happen, of that she was certain.

"So, where were we?" John wondered out loud, and before she could ask what he was talking about, he added. "Oh yes, we were about to go have lunch. I believe that you still have an hour before your briefing with Lorne's team."

"I should probably go back to work," Elizabeth said. "And you should too."

"Come on, Elizabeth. You can't skip lunch. I promise I'll get you back here in half an hour," he added, knowing that she liked having some time to review her notes before a briefing.

Knowing that she wouldn't have the last word, Elizabeth relented and nodded. They stopped by her office, so they could leave the books there, before going to the mess. All the while, a smile was playing on Elizabeth's lips.

"You're happy," John finally said as they sat with their trays at a table beside the windows.

"I am, yes."

"So what do you think of the story River and the Doctor told us?" he asked, wanting to have her opinion now that they were alone.

"I have to say that it was strange, to say the least. But we've seen stranger things in our time here, haven't we?"

"Yeah... That's a nice little trick they have, being able to regenerate."

"I might be able to breathe easier if your team could do it, you more than the others," she admitted.

"Because you can't live without me?" he asked, jokingly, but she knew that, in a way, he was really asking.

"Well that, and because you're the one trouble finds the most often."

They shared a look, thinking about some of the too close calls they had. There were times, like when they were aboard that hive, when she thought that the team – he – was dead. There was nothing either of them could do about it; his team would always go on the most dangerous missions and coming back unscathed every single time was a promise he couldn't make. When they began their relationship, they agreed to never let it interfere with their work, and they knew that it might one day mean sending the other to their death to protect Atlantis and its people.

"You know, now that I think about it, I kind of regenerated myself when Todd gave me back the life he took from me and some. Carson did say that I came back from the mission at least a few months younger than when I left."

"If by younger he meant more immature..." Elizabeth said playfully, and he narrowed his eyes at her. "I don't think I have weirder mornings than the one we just had, but I wouldn't trade it for anything."

"I didn't think you would. We should probably leave the fact that River Song is your not-so-dead childhood friend out of our reports, though. I think that even though our jobs calls for weirdness, this would be too much."

Elizabeth nodded, agreeing to his statement; she didn't think the IOA would be too impressed about that either. They wouldn't hide having met with River, the Doctor, Amy and Rory, but no one outside of John and Lorne's teams needed to know about what happened in her childhood, and no one needed to know what had been said in the briefing room. No one except maybe Rodney, who had been present during their goodbyes and most probably had questions. She resolved to stop by his lab in the afternoon to talk to him.

"Well, time to go back to work," she said seeing that both their trays were empty. "And I think you have a sparring session planned with Ronon."

"If I don't come to get you for dinner, don't go assuming I have forgotten," he replied, taking her tray before she could get up from her chair. "It might just mean I'm in the infirmary."

They parted ways at the doors, with nothing more than a look shared, keeping true to their promise to stay as professional as possible while on duty.

 

###

 

By the time the Doctor sent the TARDIS into the Vortex, River was nowhere to be found. Even if he wanted to go look for her, he understood that she needed some time alone. He decided on going beneath the console, sitting on the swing and trying to fix, for the nth time, the Chameleon Circuit. He was certain he would be able to fix it one day. But he had grown fond of the blue police box, and he could feel that the TARDIS had too. That was why he was taking his time trying to fix it.

Now, though, he was just using it as the perfect excuse to give River some time. His mind wasn't on the wires he was holding; his thoughts went to his wife and he wondered why there were some times where she didn't want to talk to him. Maybe he wasn't the best listener, but he could try, for her, but she didn't seem to notice. She would keep everything to herself, closing up like a clam, and he knew in these occasions that he shouldn't even try to make her talk. Today would be no exception, he was sure, and when he joined her, wherever she might be, she would start a conversation on a topic light years away from the one that was currently occupying her mind.

He was acting this way too, he knew that. It was his – _their_ – way to protect themselves. He could kid himself and say that it was a gallifreyan trait, but he knew she picked it up from him. They were alike, he and River, even though neither of them was willing to admit it; they would rather brood on their own instead of talking to each other.

When he estimated that enough time had passed, the Doctor left the control room. He didn't have to look very long to find River: she was in the kitchen, sitting before a cup of tea, just as he had expected her to. He saw another cup of tea waiting for him at the counter, and he took it before going to sit on the other side of the table from his wife. They drank their tea in silence, River anxiously waiting for the Doctor to start asking questions, and he unsure of what he could say.

Finally, they were saved from this uncomfortable silence by footsteps coming in their direction. Sure enough, Amy and Rory entered the kitchen. Amy made a beeline for the kettle and they heard her growl when she found it empty. Rory went to sit beside his daughter, who planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Slept well?" she asked as her mother filled the kettle with water and put it back on the stove.

"Yes," Rory answered. "You?"

River shrugged; it had been a while since she had last had a full night's sleep. She could actually barely remember the last time she slept the whole night without waking up from nightmares. It must have been when she was a child, as Mels, even though she remembered more nightmares than peaceful dreams from that time. Now, there were times when she wasn't even trying to go to sleep anymore. Her Time Lord DNA made sure that she didn't need sleep as much as her parents did, and it was a real blessing in her case.

"So what have you two done when we were asleep?" Amy asked as she came to the table with cups of tea for Rory and herself. "Got married again?"

"You're never going to let us forget about this one, are you Mum?" River asked with a smile.

"You got married on Space Vegas while we were sleeping, so no, I don't think so. Rory and I should have been there. We could even have had a double wedding."

Rory's eyebrows shot up and his eyes went wide at Amy's suggestion. It wasn't that he was opposed to the idea – he actually kind of liked it – but even he would find it weird to get married at the same time as his daughter. But apparently, that wasn't bothering his wife, nor his daughter he realised as he looked at her. The only one who seemed to be thinking as he did was the Doctor who had choked on his tea when Amy talked about a double wedding. At least, if he had to defend his point of view, he wouldn't be on his own. Or come to think of it, he might be on his own seeing as the Doctor always tried his best to stay on Amy and River's right side. He could understand why: together, they were a force to be reckoned with.

Thankfully for him, the conservation rapidly moved to other topics. He had noticed that it was River who changed topics, and that she had never answered Amy's first question. And that was when he noticed it, the look in her eyes. Something had happened to her and the Doctor when he and Amy were asleep, something that profoundly moved his daughter. She was always so careful never to let them see anything usually, and he understood why she did that; it was the way she had found to protect herself and them, the Doctor included. The Doctor wasn't duped, of that he was sure, but he didn't know whether River realised that he could see past the mask she put on as well.

But even though he could see that she was hiding something from them, he wouldn't try talking to her. She was too much like Amy on that subject and he knew it wouldn't work. While he was one to speak about his feelings, his two girls weren't. And he respected that. But that didn't mean he didn't wish he could erase that look from River's eyes and soothe her worry. She was still his daughter, no matter what, and he was feeling just like any father would in this situation. It didn't matter that their family was unconventional, he still took his role very seriously.

He had to admit that he was glad that River had finally opened up earlier about a part of her life she had never talked to them about. They hadn't said a word when she talked, nor did they after they finished. He and Amy just did what every parent would do in this case, and took her in their arms. It had been enough for them; no word had been needed, everything had been said at least once in the past and they didn't have to go through that again.

He wondered if that story was still haunting her and was the reason for this look in her eyes. Or maybe something else had happened to them when he and Amy were asleep. He guessed he would never get an answer, but he hoped that whatever it was, River would soon be feeling better.

"Well, I think it's time for me to go back to Stormcage," River said, as the conversation came to a lull. "My guards are going to think I'm never coming back if I stay away any longer."

"They should have got by now that you'll always come back, even if you're a little late," Amy said.

"Oh Mother, I don't think it will ever happen. They don't trust me enough for that, and they probably never will, and I can't blame them."

The two women left the kitchen first, and the Doctor was about to follow when Rory stopped him with a hand on his arm.

"What is it?" the Doctor asked.

"You'll always take care of her, right? Even when... even when Amy and I aren't here anymore," Rory said, knowing that given their shorter lifespan, it would happen.

"Of course, of course I will, Rory," the Doctor replied, holding Rory by the shoulders to look at him in the eyes.

"Good. Because if you don't, I'll kick your Time Lord butt, you can be sure of that."

"I know."

Nodding at each other in understanding, the two men quickly went to join their wives, not wanting them to wonder where they had been. In the control room, River was about to enter the coordinate for Stormcage but Amy stopped her.

"Maybe you should drop us off first," Amy said, looking at her daughter and son-in-law.

"Oh, I thought I could take you somewhere else before you had to leave," the Doctor said.

"Maybe another time? We have quite a lot of things to do at home."

The Doctor tried not to think about how, a while ago, home used to be the TARDIS for them too. But he had sent them away, to protect them, and he couldn't go back on this decision. River had already entered the coordinates to her parents' house, and he trusted her to pilot them safely there.

"Where are you going now, Doctor?" Amy asked him as River landed the TARDIS in the garden.

"I was thinking of going to Ancient Egypt," he replied without really thinking, but he found out that he actually liked the idea.

"You'd better be careful there, Sweetie. There are dangers of all kinds there."

"Yes, like curses," Rory joked along.

"Haha, very funny."

They said their goodbyes, and the TARDIS left, leaving Amy and Rory behind.

 

To be continued...


	2. Chapter 2

River couldn't stay in the TARDIS any longer, she simply couldn't. She couldn't stay here and watch the Doctor mourn her parents all day long, not when she couldn't allow herself to mourn them too. Reading the last page hadn't helped him as much as she – and Amy – had hoped it would.

Losing Amy and Rory had reopened old wounds. She listened to him as he told her about losing Donna and Rose, Astrid Perth, Adric and Peri. She had known that he had lost many people over the years, but she had never realised how affected he still was by these losses. She didn't say anything once he fell silent; there was just nothing she could say after that. There was just one thing she wanted to ask, but she wasn't sure whether she wanted to know the answer.

She had learned a long time ago that there were some questions she just couldn't voice. Most of them, she ended up getting an answer to by researching him and his companions. But there were a couple of questions that would probably remain unanswered. Maybe it was for the best; there were just some things she wasn't supposed to know about him, like why a sad look crossed his face whenever she mentioned going into the TARDIS library.

She sighed, sitting on their bed. She knew he was hurting, and that he was still angry at her for taking her mother's side. But she couldn't have done anything else, not after she had spent years growing up with them, seeing them fall in love. Amy had to follow Rory; there hadn't been another choice. And maybe, just maybe, there was a small part of her, that part of her that would forever remain that lonely little girl in an orphanage in Florida, who wanted her parents to be together.

But the Doctor didn't see it that way, not yet. He needed time to heal, to come to terms with never seeing Amy and Rory again. And she needed time to do the same too. And neither of them would be able to do that if she stayed in the TARDIS. It was time for her to go.

She quickly gathered the few possessions she had on the TARDIS and put them in her bag. She listened for any sound coming from the Doctor, but she could only hear the humming coming from the TARDIS itself. She wondered how long it would take him to notice that she was gone. It wasn't like there had been a lot of communication between them in the past few weeks. There were days when she barely saw him, and even more days when they didn't even speak to each other; she wouldn't be missed.

The TARDIS humming changed, as if she wanted to reassure River that someone would miss her. She smiled and put her hand on the closest wall. She would miss her too, but it was time for her to go. She couldn't stay, the Doctor couldn't heal if he saw the one person who reminds him of Amy and Rory whenever he deigned leave his swing beneath the console.

She strapped the vortex manipulator on her wrist and entered the coordinates to the one place where she would find the comfort she needed. She sent one last apologetic thought to the one parent she had left, and pressed the button that would take her away.

 

###

 

Elizabeth woke up with a start as a flash illuminated her room, and a crackling sound filled her ears. She sat up in bed and looked around, trying to identify where this had come from. She tensed when she found a silhouette standing beside the window, but relaxed when she recognized it.

"River?" she asked, her voice rough from sleep.

Her childhood friend nodded, even though Elizabeth hadn't needed an answer. She turned on the bedside lamp and took in River's appearance: her hair was dishevelled and she was close to tears.

"What happened?" she asked, getting up from the bed.

"Not now," River replied.

It wasn't hard for Elizabeth to guess that something bad had happened to River or someone close to her. She was reassured that her friend didn't seem to be physically hurt, but she knew for a fact that psychological wounds were the ones that hurt the most. She did the only thing she could at the moment: she stepped closer to River and gathered her in her arms.

River didn't resist and immediately let herself go in Elizabeth's arms. She didn't cry though; she couldn't let all her defences fall this soon. And if a small part of her refused to let Elizabeth see the damage, she wouldn't listen to it, not this time; she knew that, unlike the Doctor, her friend could accept it.

Neither knew how much time had passed when River stepped out of Elizabeth's arms. This was when she truly noticed that it was night time and Elizabeth had been sleeping when she arrived. River hadn't really considered when she would arrive when she entered the coordinates in her vortex manipulator; she had just chosen a date at random, only making sure that it was after they had found each other again. It hadn't mattered to her when exactly she would arrive. Maybe if she did pay more attention, she wouldn't have disturbed her friend's sleep.

Seeing the look on River's face, Elizabeth understood what was going on in her mind. She caught her hands in hers and found her eyes.

"It's alright. You were right to come now. I've told you that you could come any time you want."

Elizabeth's last sentence prompted a thought in River's mind; before she could say or do anything else, she needed to know when they were.

"When did we last see each other?" River asked.

"You came here a couple of months ago," Elizabeth said, without missing a beat; they had done that before and she quickly understood why it was important. "We spent most of the night watching movies and talking, just like we did when we were kids."

"Good."

They seemed to still be linear and River was glad for that; she didn't know what she would have done if she had arrived before the time she took her parents here. She couldn't have told Elizabeth what happened if she had; even though she trusted her friend not to say a word about Manhattan, she wouldn't have wanted to put that burden on her shoulders.

"What happened, River?" Elizabeth asked, knowing that she wouldn't talk unless she was prompted.

"Not now, please."

Elizabeth could see that River wasn't ready to talk, and she didn't insist; there would be time for that later. Now, though, it was the early hours of the morning, and there were still hours before the sun would rise above the ocean surrounding the City.

She could see the exhaustion on River's face, and she knew that it wasn't just one of the consequences of what happened; it was easy to see that her friend hadn't slept well – if at all – for days.

"Come on, River," she said, taking her hand and tugging her towards the bed. "You need some sleep."

"No, I…"

"When is the last time you lied in bed and slept?" Elizabeth asked, stopping River's protest.

When River didn't reply, Elizabeth knew that she had been right. She made her sit on the bed, and she heard River sigh as she realised that she had no choice. Elizabeth went to her side of the bed, and lied down on her side, waiting for her friend to do the same.

It took a couple of minutes before River mimicked Elizabeth's position.

"You're sure you don't mind?" she asked the brunette.

"It's not the first time we share a bed," Elizabeth reminded her. "Even though it has been years, it shouldn't be any different than when we were kids. And John is off-world on an overnight mission, if that's what you are worried about."

If River was honest, she hadn't even thought about Colonel John Sheppard before coming here. Her mind had been focused on Elizabeth and the safe haven she would find in coming to Atlantis. But now that she looked past Elizabeth and at the rest of the room, she noticed many men's belongings scattered everywhere.

"You two are living together now?" she asked.

"More or less," Elizabeth replied, blushing just a bit. "Most of his clothes are here, his guitar too, and we spend more nights together than apart, but he still has a few things in his quarters. We're taking it slow."

"Elizabeth," River sighed, "there's taking it slow, as you say, and barely moving an inch in months. And it looks to me that you and John are closer to the latter than the former. The last time I was here, you told me that you had been together for more than a year. Some people would be engaged by then."

"You know, what works for you and the Doctor, doesn't automatically work for other people," Elizabeth said, a bit more abruptly than she wanted.

"I know. People don't usually get willingly married to someone they haven't dated beforehand."

River knew she had surprised Elizabeth with her words. She had never told her the particulars of her relationship with the Doctor. If her friend had ever thought that their relationship was like any other, she couldn't have been farther away from the reality. And she knew she would surprise her again with what she would say next.

"At least, that was true for our first wedding."

"Your _first_ wedding?" Elizabeth repeated. "How many times have you married the man?"

"More times than I could count," River replied with an enigmatic smile. At Elizabeth's look, though, she continued. "Alright, I think the latest count is at 154. But I guess that my favourite one remains our first, even though it happened in a timeline that doesn't exist anymore. This was when I made time collapse; I think I mentioned it to you."

"You did, although, you didn't say anything about a wedding at the time."

"Well, we got married. All that to say, Elizabeth, I agree that everybody moves at their own rhythm, but to me, it looks like you're holding back."

Elizabeth thought for a moment before nodding in agreement. Even though she had never thought about it before, she had to admit that River was correct in her assessment. Maybe it was time for her and John to move forward. After all, to any outsider, it probably looked like they were already living together; they might just as well make it official.

They were nowhere near ready to take it any farther though, not to mention that the IOA might have something to say about it if they did. It didn't matter that they had proven on many occasions already that their personal relationship didn't interfere with their work: Chen and the others – with the exception of Richard Woolsey maybe – were just waiting for them to make a mistake. She wouldn't give them this satisfaction and she knew that John agreed with her.

"You know what I love the most about weddings?" River asked, interrupting Elizabeth's thoughts.

"What is it?"

"The wedding night," River replied raising her eyebrows suggestively.

They laughed together at these words, but soon enough, Elizabeth started to yawn. With all this talk, they had almost forgotten that it was still the middle of the night, a time when the Lantean leader was supposed to be asleep. River felt guilty but took care of hiding it from her friend; she could already hear the brunette protesting that she didn't mind being awake at the wee hours of the morning.

"You should get some more sleep," River said, stroking Elizabeth's arm, just like she had done maybe times in the past. "It wouldn't do for you to be half-asleep come morning."

"Yeah... And I have a briefing with Rodney and Radek first thing in the morning. Although I probably won't understand a word they say anyway. You know me and science."

"Maybe I could come with you," River offered. "I don't know everything there is to know about your work here, but I may grasp enough concepts to help."

"I'd like that," Elizabeth said, smiling, before yawning once more.

"Ok, sleep now."

"Try to sleep for a while too."

"I'll try," River promised, knowing that it was the least she could do to reassure Elizabeth.

They said their goodnights and Elizabeth turned off the bedside lamp.

The room now only bathed by the City's lights coming from outside, River watched as her friend's eyes closed. It didn't take long for her breathing to even out. River smiled; unless something bothered her enough to keep her awake, Elizabeth had always been able to fall asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow. For her, it was quite the opposite; nightmares had plagued her dreams since she was a child in that orphanage in Florida, and there were moments when she was afraid to even close her eyes. She was glad for her Time Lord constitution that meant she didn't need to sleep quite as much as her parents or Elizabeth.

Sleep wouldn't come for River tonight; she didn't want to close her eyes and relive what had happened in New York. She could still see Amy disappearing right before her eyes, and even though she had agreed with her choice at the time, and she still did, it hurt. It hurt because she knew that from now on, she would only meet younger versions of her parents who had no idea who she really was. And if she had expected that to happen at one point – just like she knew it would happen with the Doctor – it didn't mean it hurt less.

She wanted to get up from the bed, but she was worried she would wake Elizabeth up with her movements, and so she stayed perfectly still. She was used to not moving for hours on end after all; it had been part of her training when the Church was shaping her into the perfect weapon. If she had long since pushed most of her training to the back of her mind, locked away never to be thought of again, she still retained some of it that proved to be useful in her adventures with the Doctor. And she knew that tonight, more than any other time since she had freed herself from the influence of the Church, she was using her training to stop her walls from crumbling down right here and now.

She couldn't allow herself to break down. Not yet.

 

###

 

Even though she had been sure she wouldn't, River must have fallen asleep, because she could swear she had just closed her eyes for a second, and it was suddenly morning. Her sleep had been nightmare free, a rarity she attributed only to her friend's reassuring presence. Elizabeth was still sound asleep beside her, but as the sky was lightening up outside, River knew it wouldn't last long. She would soon be up and rushing to get ready for the day.

Seeing movement at the corner of her eye, River turned her head just as the door opened. John came in, carrying three mugs and what looked like breakfast on a tray. He smiled, obviously not surprised to see her there, and that was when she noticed his jacket draped over a chair; it hadn't been there last night which told her that he had come in earlier, and neither she nor Elizabeth had heard him. She was surprised: never before had that happened. Either she had been more exhausted than she had thought or her mind had turned itself off, giving her one night of peace.

Careful not to wake up Elizabeth, she got up from the bed and walked towards John who was standing before one of the windows. Her clothes were rumpled from having been slept in, and she dreaded to think what her hair looked like, but it would do for the moment. She took the mug John was offering her and smiled when she saw it was filled with tea, unlike the other two that were holding coffee.

"I hope I remembered well," John whispered, not wanting to wake up Elizabeth one minute too early either; they both knew how she was in the morning.

"It's perfect," she replied, after having taken a sip.

River turned towards the window and watched as the sun started to rise above the ocean. There was a time, when she was Mels, living in Leadworth, when she couldn't care less for something like this. But after Berlin, she had learned to appreciate such a sight. The anger directed towards the Doctor that she had felt for so long had disappeared and with this newfound peace of mind, what Amy and Rory had tried to make her understand for years had finally sunk in.

She could feel John's eyes on her as she was looking outside. She could almost hear his thoughts, hear the questions he wanted to ask and she wasn't quite ready to answer. She chose to speak first, hoping that it would stop him from asking them, but all the while knowing that it would just buy her some time.

"Elizabeth said you were off-world for the night," she said, genuinely curious as to why he seemed to have come back early.

"I was. We came back a couple of hours earlier. One of the new guys fell and broke his wrist," he explained and she could hear the frustration in his voice. 

"What was the mission about? If it's not classified, of course," she added.

"Atlantis itself is classified, so I think we crossed that line a long time ago. And I think you're pretty good at keeping secrets."

He hadn't meant it as an accusation, but River took it that way nonetheless. He was right; there were some things she hadn't told them and she never would. Stormcage was one of those things she hid from them. Berlin was another. There were just some things even your childhood best friend wouldn't understand. But Elizabeth had never called her on it; she understood the need to keep secrets.

It was easy to understand why John didn't see it that way though; he had to protect his people and Elizabeth. He didn't know her and he couldn't trust her the way Elizabeth did. It would probably never change, but he at least knew that she meant no harm and that was what was the most important.

"It was just a routine check up on people we recently relocated," John said after a beat. "We should have been gone overnight because of the time difference between the two planets. When it's night-time here, it's daytime on the planet. That's also one of the reasons McKay stayed behind and I decided to take a couple of guys who arrived from Earth just two days ago."

"He values his sleep too much?" she stated more than asked, and he smiled.

"You can say that. What happened?" he asked, surprising River by this change of subject.

"Not now," she replied, a lump forming in her throat as the reason for her being here came back to the front of her mind. "She doesn't know yet, and I'd rather do this only once," she said, looking over her shoulder at the still sleeping Elizabeth.

There was no question she would tell John too. From the moment she saw him walk into the room, she knew he would be there when she told Elizabeth. And she didn't mind it; even though he didn't trust her, she trusted him enough to tell him what happened in New York.

They heard bed sheets rustling behind them, and turned to see a half-awake Elizabeth sitting up in bed.

"Hey, Sleeping Beauty," John said, smiling at the sight.

"Is that coffee?" she just replied, her voice rough from sleep.

When John nodded, she got up and walked towards them. She took the mug John was handing her, placing a quick kiss on his lips, before turning and kissing River's cheek too. She brought the mug to her lips and took a large gulp of the lukewarm coffee. It wasn't as hot as she would like, but she knew better than to complain; John would just tell her that she should have woken up sooner. Speaking of him, now that she was more awake, she wondered what he was doing here.

"Not that I'm not happy to see you, John, but shouldn't you be off-world?"

"Like I told River, Rollins fell and broke his wrist so we had to come back earlier. But we had made it to the settlement before that and they're fine," he added, knowing that it would have been her next question.

"Good."

"Anyway, I saw you replaced me quite easily," he said with a smile.

"My arrival was quite unexpected."

"But never unwanted," Elizabeth replied, holding River's gaze to make sure she understood it was the truth.

"I know. Still, I didn't want to wake you up in the middle of the night."

"You came when you needed to. I don't care what time it was."

River grabbed Elizabeth's free hand and squeezed it, trying to convey everything she wouldn't say out loud. She knew it was time for her to tell them why she was here; she wasn't any more ready than she was last night, but she knew she couldn't wait anymore.

Not letting go of Elizabeth's hand, she turned back towards the window. She took a deep breath and pushing her feelings aside for the moment, she started talking. She told them everything from the moment she arrived in New York in 1938, to when she first saw her father in Central Park. She told them about the Doctor and Amy's arrival, a smile on her face as she remembered the kiss he had planted on her cheek. She left out the part where she had to break her wrist, knowing that it would be hard to explain.

Their mugs were long since emptied and forgotten on Elizabeth's desk when she reached the end of her tale. She was barely able to contain her emotions when she told them about what happened in the cemetery, about how she hadn't been able to say goodbye to her father, about the choice her mother had made. She could feel Elizabeth's hand tightening around hers and John's eyes on her, both of them silently assuring her that they were there.

"We can never see them again, they created a fixed point in time. But they're together, just the way it should be. That's what matters the most." She paused, taking another deep breath. "Amy asked me to take care of him and I stayed with him until last night. But I couldn't stay anymore. I can't watch him mourning my parents when I... when I can't do the same."

"Why can't you?" Elizabeth asked, tears running down her cheeks; she had only seen Amy and Rory once after what happened on the planet, but they were her friend's parents.

"That's the thing with the Doctor: you can't let him see the damage. He's not good at dealing with it."

"And in the meantime, you're left to deal with what happened on your own," John said, reproach in his voice.

"It doesn't matter now. She's not alone," Elizabeth replied, before River had time to rise to the Doctor's defence. "River," she whispered, forcing her to face her.

When she took in River's face, her eyes filled with tears she refused to shed, Elizabeth wrapped her arms around her and held her tight. It took but a second for River to return the embrace just as tightly. It was then that she finally allowed herself to cry. Away from the Doctor, she could finally mourn her parents.

John was about to leave them alone, to give them some time, but he caught Elizabeth's eyes, silently asking him to stay. He complied; it wasn't like he was in any hurry to go write the mission report, and he and Elizabeth still had an hour before their day really started.

When her tears finally stopped rolling down her cheeks, River released her hold on Elizabeth and took a step away. She thanked her with a look, not yet trusting her voice. She could see that her friend had shed a few tears for her too, and she dried her cheeks with her thumb. They smiled at each other before River turned to John. She conveyed her thanks silently to him too, and he nodded imperceptibly at her.

"I should probably go. You have to work."

"Do you have anywhere you need to be? Things to do?" Elizabeth asked, and River shook her head no. "Then why don't you stay here for a while? Take a break from your life."

"What about your people back on Earth? How would you explain me if they learn I was here?"

"They know about you," Elizabeth replied. "They don't know everything, and they certainly don't know about our past, but they know enough that your presence won't be a problem."

"And it's not the first time we have visitors on Atlantis," John intervened. "You've met Ronon and Teyla, remember?"

River nodded. She had to admit that it was tempting to give in to Elizabeth's offer. She wouldn't mind forgetting about everything else even it was just for a few days. If she went back to her house, she would be alone with her thoughts. Here maybe, she had a chance to escape them, to push them to the back of her mind and focus on something else. She guessed she could do that too by accepting one of the most recent offers she got to lead an archaeological expedition, but she didn't feel like going on a new adventure right now. Elizabeth was right: she needed a break.

"And you did promise to come to the briefing I have with Rodney and Radek," Elizabeth reminded her, and River smiled.

"You're right, I did. I guess I can't go back on a promise I made. And I'll stay for a few days after that."

"As long as you need."

"Now that this is settled, we should get ready for the day," John said. "I'll take care of finding you some quarters to stay in. And no need to argue," he added when he saw River open her mouth to protest. "There's plenty of space here. The City is the size of..." he trailed off, realising what he had been about to say.

"Manhattan, yes. Elizabeth told me once. You don't have to be careful about using some words around me. I have to come to terms with what happened, and I won't be able to do that if you try to protect me in some way."

Elizabeth and John nodded, understanding what River meant. They had to keep acting like they would usually do. This is what they would want if the same had happened to them. They wouldn't like it either if people started treating them as if they would break at any time.

"Well, like John said, time to get ready for the day. Would you mind if I use your bathroom once you're done, Elizabeth?"

"Not at all. You can go first, if you want."

"No you go. I'll need time to find my clothes and everything I need in there," she said, holding up her bag.

"You have clothes in this small bag?" John asked incredulously.

"It's dimensionally transcendental," Elizabeth replied for River. "It's bigger on the inside if you'd rather."

"Alright, I see. So what do you have in here?"

"Everything I need. Probably a gun too," she added to their surprise. "It can always be useful. Do you want me to secure it in your gun locker?"

"No, it's ok, I trust you with it," John replied.

River raised an eyebrow in surprise but nodded. She doubted that he trusted her completely, but at least, he knew that she wouldn't do anything to hurt his people and even less Elizabeth. Nodding back at her, John left Elizabeth's quarters to go get ready in his own, but not before throwing in a comment as to how it would take the two women forever to get ready for the day. Even though he couldn't see them, they both narrowed their eyes at his retreating back.

"And how long does it take him to get his hair styled this way?" River asked, turning towards Elizabeth.

"Sadly, it's doing that naturally," the brunette replied with a smile before disappearing inside the bathroom.

Placing her bag back on a chair for the moment, River turned back to the window. She took a deep breath, knowing that she had been right to decide to stay for a while.

 

###

 

It had been a month since River had first arrived on Atlantis, and so far, no one had questioned her presence here. Of course, in the first few days, she had been met by curious looks whenever she would step into the room. She had soon understood that people here had the utmost respect for Elizabeth and John, and once they saw that they considered her an ally and even a friend, she had been accepted as part of the expedition.

Early on, she had refused to be treated as a simple guest, and had asked Elizabeth how she could be of help. That was how she had first found herself babysitting a team of scientists in an as-of-yet unexplored part of the City. She remembered the look on John and Ronon's faces when they learned of her assignment, but unlike them, she wasn't just a warrior; she was an archaeologist first and foremost, and Atlantis was just a huge playground for her.

And now, she was about to embark on her first off-world mission with John's team. It was a simple recognition mission, but as Elizabeth once told her, there was no such thing for this team. She didn't mind a little bit of action; the most she had in the last month was sparring sessions with Ronon and Teyla.

"Are you sure you don't want to change into a uniform?" Elizabeth asked for the third time since River had entered the Gateroom.

"I am."

She didn't bother repeating that she would be much more at ease in her grey dress. Sure the black stockings and high boots weren't regulation, but it wasn't like she was officially part of the expedition. She had already been in a few fights in these clothes – including a verbal sparring match with the Doctor at Demon's Run – and she knew, should anything happen, they wouldn't impede her like a uniform she wasn't used to certainly would. She had agreed to wear a tactical vest, knowing that neither Elizabeth nor John would let her go off-world without one. Not that she had needed one before.

Her vortex manipulator was on her wrist; it had barely left it since she arrived in Atlantis. Her only weapon was her gun that was in her holster at her hip. John had wanted her to take a P-90 too, but one demonstration of how much damage she could do with just her gun had convinced him that it wouldn't be necessary.

Understanding that River wouldn't change her mind, Elizabeth turned towards John and made her last recommendations. River left them alone and went to stand beside Teyla. Aside from their sparring sessions, she hadn't spent a lot of time with the Athosian in the past month. She had joined her and Elizabeth for tea a couple of times, and the three of them had lunch together at least once a week. They hadn't shared much during those moments, though; it had been just enough to earn each other's trust. River knew what Elizabeth had in mind: she wanted her to really become part of the expedition.

John and Elizabeth's talk didn't last long. Soon enough, she looked up at the control room and nodded at Chuck to dial the planet. It wasn't the first time River saw the Gate opening, but it still looked a bit surreal to her. She was used to travelling to other planets and other eras, but it had always been in the TARDIS or with her vortex manipulator. Never before had she used such a technology.

If she interpreted his words correctly – and she usually did – the Doctor thought the Stargate network to be primitive. She could understand his point of view, of course; she was the child of the TARDIS, after all and she knew quite a lot about travelling through space and time. But it didn't mean that she wasn't still fascinated by the technology at work here.

The Kawoosh, as the members of the expedition called it, formed at the center of the Gate, breaking her line of thoughts.

"Be safe," Elizabeth whispered.

River was about to turn around to assure Elizabeth that they would, but she stopped when she noticed that no one on John's team was reacting to the words. It didn't take her long to realise that it was just a habit Elizabeth had when a team was about to leave, and that no reply was necessary. John and Rodney were already walking towards the Gate, and she followed with Teyla, Ronon on their sixes.

Elizabeth noticed a small hesitation right before River went through the Gate. She could understand why; it was her first time going through the Gate, and there had to be some apprehension, even for someone like River. Ronon was the last one through, and the Gate closed behind him.

She turned away and proceeded up the stairs and to her office. She had half an hour before a debriefing with Lorne's team, and she needed that time to review the files that would have to be sent to Earth by the end of the day. But, as luck would have it, just as soon as she had sat down, she heard a new gate activation. She knew for a fact that no team was due back for the next couple of hours.

As she quickly walked towards Chuck's station, her first thought was that something already went bad with John's team. His team certainly was a trouble-magnet, and she wouldn't be surprised if they ran into enemies right after having walked through the Gate.

Before she could go any further in her thoughts, the Gate opened.

"Do we have an IDC?" she asked Chuck.

"Yes. It's Colonel Carter's."

Elizabeth was surprised; not only it wasn't one of her teams, but she hadn't been told of the leader of SG1's visit. Nodding at Chuck to lower the shield, she walked towards the stairs and down. Sam was just walking through the Gate when Elizabeth reached the bottom.

"Colonel Carter," Elizabeth greeted her. "To what do we owe the pleasure?"

"I'm sorry to drop by unannounced but there wasn't much time to warn you."

"Is there a problem?" Elizabeth asked, worried that something had happened at the SGC.

"A message from the Daedalus reached us a couple of hours ago through one of our allies. They seem to have problems with one of the engines and the shields that the technicians on board can't seem to be able to fix. Since I was free, I offered General Landry to come take a look, so as not to burden someone on your expedition. I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all. Although, I'm afraid the Daedalus hasn't arrived yet, and it shouldn't be here until tomorrow morning. Why didn't they contact the SGC directly?"

"It looks that whatever the problem is with the engine, it's affecting the long range communications."

"This sounds serious," Elizabeth said. "You're welcome to borrow a couple of scientists if need be."

"I hope it won't come to that, but thank you."

The two women shared a smile. They both knew that there would be one scientist very eager to help Sam once he knew she was in Atlantis.

"Let me show you your quarters," Elizabeth offered, gesturing for Sam to follow her out of the Gateroom.

"I hope I don't stop you from doing something more important."

"I was just doing one last review of the files we're going to send to Earth, tonight."

"Yes, that's quite fastidious."

"You can say that," Elizabeth said with a smile. "And if you want to add anything, you're welcome to."

"I just might take you up on that offer," Sam replied; even though General Landry would probably call him to inform him of the situation, she would rather send her own message to Jack.

"If you have some time, I have a debriefing in twenty minutes with Major Lorne's team. They came back last night from a planet where they found Ancient ruins. From what he briefly told me before he left for his post-mission check-up, there were some strange energy readings, too. I think you might be interested as Earth's leading expert on Ancient technology."

"I might be the leading expert on Ancient technology _on_ Earth, but McKay has more experience with it since he lives here," Sam corrected her. "But it sounds interesting so I'll show up."

"Good. And here you are," Elizabeth said as she stopped in front of a door and opened it. "I trust that you remember were the mess and the other facilities are."

"I do."

"Then, I'll leave you to settle, and I'll see you in the briefing room."

"Thank you," Sam replied, entering her temporary quarters and closing the door behind her.

Putting her duffle bag next to the desk, she walked towards the floor to ceiling windows. As the sun reflected on the ocean, she thought that she wouldn't mind having this kind of view in her quarters at the SGC instead of being surrounded by gray walls.

 

###

 

River was frozen to the bones when she stepped on the other side of the Gate. Elizabeth and John had warned her that it would happen, but there was no way she could have been prepared for that. She didn't always travel through space and time safely inside the TARDIS, but even though the vortex manipulator was doing funny things to her hair, it had never left her cold like she was now.

"If you're feeling dizzy, just sit for a moment and it'll pass," John said, standing beside her. "We're in no hurry."

"Thank you, but I'm feeling perfectly fine."

"Really? You don't feeling like puking?" Rodney asked, surprised.

"Why would I?" River replied, raising an eyebrow.

"What Rodney means is that when you travel through the Gate for the first time, you can feel sick," Teyla clarified.

"If you feel sick after stepping through the Gate, you should never travel with a vortex manipulator," she said, holding up her wrist. "Or in the TARDIS when the Doctor is flying her," she added as an afterthought. "I'm cold but the trip through the Gate was fine otherwise."

Rodney and John were looking at her as if she had grown a second head while Teyla was keeping her head down to hide a smile. Ronon, on the other hand, wasn't hiding his; he looked at her and nodded at her; she knew she had earned the Satedan's respect during their sparring sessions, but it looked like he was appreciating her all the more right now.

"Well, since we don't need to take a break, let's go," John said.

As per his instructions before they left the City, he took the lead, followed by Rodney and Teyla, and River and Ronon brought up the rear. While keeping an eye on any danger that could come upon them, River looked around. Even though it was exactly what she had been told she would see, she was a bit disappointed by this planet. She was used, in her adventures with the Doctor or on her own, to more exotic planets, and this simple forest was too dull for her. 

She wouldn't complain though; even though Atlantis fascinated her, a change of scenery was nice. Not to mention that for her companions, it wasn't an adventure, but a mission, and they had to complete it. She could feel Ronon's eyes on her, and when she turned to look at him, he sent her a knowing look: he knew exactly what was on her mind because he was thinking the same.

"This is not the kind of planet you're used to," Ronon said, finally voicing his thoughts.

"Not really, no. I've been to planets like this one before, but only for archaeological digs. Otherwise, I find them to be quite boring."

"Which planets aren't boring?" he replied.

Ahead of them, River could see that John had slightly turned his head towards them, while still keeping an eye and an ear out for danger. She had told Elizabeth of her adventures, but he had never been there when she did. She could easily understand his curiosity now.

"I've seen planets that are just one huge market, planets where people lived inside trees and planets with moving mountains. I've even heard of a Library planet, but it had been forbidden to go there after some kind of incident. But I think my favourite planet is the one I will never be able to go to. It has an orange sky, golden fields and fields of red grass, trees with silver leaves and red deserts."

"Why can't you ever go there?" Ronon asked.

"It's a long story," she answered, not really wanting to talk about it.

"How do you know so much about this world if you have never been there?" John asked, proving that he had been listening to the conversation.

River remained silent, not wanting to let them know that this world was the Doctor's. She didn't want to have to explain to them how Gallifrey had become lost, and why the Doctor was now the last of the Time Lords. John didn't insist; he seemed to accept that it was a question he would never have an answer to. It wouldn't be his first – nor last – question left unanswered after all.

"Well, while there are markets on some planets, it must be nothing compared to the ones you mentioned," John said, changing the subject back to the planets they visited. "It's great to have that kind of diversity, although I wish we had it in the planets we visit, too. For us, it's usually dense forests like this one or deserts. Change would be nice, really."

She could easily understand what he meant. If she had to go to the same kind of planets over and over again, it would quickly become tiring. She hated routine, and it was why she had so often escaped from Stormcage in the past, even without the Doctor. Maybe when they were back on Atlantis, she could ask Elizabeth to take a look at the planets database; she might recognize one she already went to and that didn't have a forest or a desert. It would certainly be a refreshing change for them.

They stopped talking and the silence surrounding them was only broken by some birds chirping and Rodney's heavy breathing. They still couldn't see any signs of the planet being inhabited. They knew better than to assume that it was uninhabited; on many worlds, people had learnt to hide themselves, and with the Wraith out there, it was only wise to do so.

"Can't we stop for a while?" Rodney finally said. "We've been walking for almost two hours."

"I guess we can," John replied.

He knew better than to try to make the scientist continue walking when he started to ask for them to stop. He had soon found out that it was easier to give in, and rest for ten minutes, instead of pushing him to go any further. It would only serve to make them stop longer.

River couldn't say she was unpleased by the break. Although she wasn't nearly as tired as Rodney was, she wasn't really used to long treks anymore. Sure, it had been part of her training, but that was years and years ago. She now preferred to use her vortex manipulator to cover long distances. It also meant she had more time to spend at the location. At the very least, all her running with the Doctor had kept her in really good shape – better shape than the scientist – and she could probably surprise John and the two Pegasus natives once again.

She took her water can out of her bag and took a sip. Reaching inside again, she found a protein bar and handed it to Rodney who was sitting on a boulder. He accepted it with a grateful smile, and she met Teyla's eyes over the scientist's head. The Athosian nodded imperceptibly, showing River that she was appreciating her concern about Rodney. River wanted to shrug her shoulders in dismissal – it was nothing really – but she soon understood that her gesture told them that she was really part of the team, even though it was only temporary. Instead, she smiled back at her.

Knowing that John and Ronon were keeping an eye on the perimeter, River walked towards Teyla.

"I hope this first off-world mission isn't too tiring for you," Teyla asked, with concern in her voice.

"Not at all. I'm used to running with the Doctor. He has the tendency to annoy the wrong people."

"I see. Elizabeth says the same about John and Rodney sometimes."

"She mentioned something about a game that wasn't a game, once," River said, remembering one of her previous conversation with her friend.

"Yes. They thought they were playing a game when they were actually giving instructions to two opposing people on a planet. Elizabeth had to be the one to try to reconcile them when they found out the truth. You can imagine that she was none too happy with them."

"I'm surprised they're still alive, actually."

They laughed heartily, provoking curious looks from the three men. Rodney opened his mouth to ask what they were laughing about, but one look from John shut him up. He knew that it probably had to do with them, and he didn't need to know more.

As River and Teyla calmed down, the Colonel noticed that Rodney had finished eating his protein bar. He took one last sip of water before putting it back in his backpack. It was time to resume walking.

"Is everyone rested enough?" he asked.

Everyone but Rodney nodded. The scientist held two fingers and John agreed to let him sit here for a while longer.

"How long are we going to keep walking if we find nothing?" River asked, curious.

"We don't have to be back in Atlantis for another 6 hours. I'd say we continue walking for two hours, and if we find nothing we'll go back to the Gate."

"Well, I for one, hope that we will find something," Rodney said. "If we walked all this way for nothing..."

"Yes McKay, we know," John cut in before the scientist could start ranting. "Can we go, now?"

Even though they could all see that Rodney would rather stay put for a few more minutes, he got up and shouldered his backpack. They took back their respective positions, and resumed walking.

It didn't take them long after that to finally come into view of some ruins. It was easy to see the relief in Rodney's eyes when he spotted them: he hadn't walked for so long for nothing.

As they reached it, River stopped and took a look around. She counted two pillars still standing, while six others were in various state of ruin. They were encircling a large lying stone; it looked like some kind of circle used for a ritual. The lying stone could be an altar stone, pretty much like the one at Stonehenge.

Thinking about Stonehenge and what happened there, she decided to make sure there would be no bad surprise, she took her scanner out of her bag, and checked the readings. She was relieved to see that the stones were emitting no energy of any kind.

Knowing that she was their resident archaeologist for the time being, she turned towards the team. She saw that Rodney had his own scanner in his hands and made the checks too, and she couldn't blame him; better be safe than sorry.

"It's safe," she announced.

"She's right. I can't pick any energy reading. These are just ruins."

"Alright then," John said. "Let's take a closer look."

River, being the closest, was the first to enter the circle. On the pillars closest to her, she could see writings in a language she didn't know. Soon enough, though, the words changed into English. She knew it was working for her only; as she had explained to her father when they were at Grayle's, it was a gift of the TARDIS. The team, having never travelled in the Doctor's ship, couldn't have it. They needed her to know what the text was saying.

Without thinking, she brushed her hand against one of the pillars, taking off some of the moss that was hiding the writings. She was about to get her notebook out of her bag to take notes when she heard a beeping sound.

"The energy levels are rising," Rodney said in an urgent voice.

"I thought you said you couldn't detect any energy here?" John asked, turning to him.

"There wasn't," River replied for the scientist.

"Then what is this?" Ronon asked.

John was about to ask what he was talking about when he saw it: the pillars were now emitting an electric field. Soon, it ran between the pillars, completely surrounding the team. They were trapped inside the circle.

River looked around her, reading the text as fast as she could. She hoped to find an answer there, but she knew that it was probably a waste of time: some of the text had faded away, and there was just too many to read. The answer might be here, but she might not find it.

For a second, she wondered what it was with her and ruins in the Pegasus Galaxy: they seemed to have it in for her.

"McKay?" River heard John call as she was concentrated on her reading.

"The energy levels are still rising. And before you ask, I don't know why it started nor how to stop it," he said, his voice rising along with his frustration.

"River, an idea?"

"I don't know either, John. Keep an eye on the energy levels, Doctor McKay, and tell me when they start to get dangerously high."

"They already are, if you want my opinion," he replied.

"Can't we just run through?" Ronon asked.

"It might be more dangerous. We don't know what kind of energy it is," John answered, dismissing the idea, even though it was more tempting than standing here like sitting ducks.

"It's starting to glow," Teyla said, in her calm voice.

River turned around and she saw that the Athosian was right; while it had seemed inactive until now, the altar stone was glowing, and she could see an electrical field appearing.

"Ok, time to go," River said, taking one last look at the writings on the stone.

"I thought we've established we couldn't leave," Rodney replied, and River smiled enigmatically at him.

"Not the way we came, we can't," she said, quickly entering coordinates on her vortex manipulator. "Now, hold onto me."

"Is it safe?"

"It certainly looks safer than staying here," Teyla answered to the scientist.

River felt hands wrapping around her arms and shoulders. She waited for John's go, and when he did, she pressed the button and took them out of there.

 

To be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

Her message to Jack written and encoded so only he could open it, Sam went to the control room and asked Chuck to add it to the other files. Compressed, the data would be sent directly to the SGC. She still remembered the first time they received news from Atlantis; the Gate had opened for less than two seconds, and they had received hours of video messages, dozens of mission reports and files about the Pegasus Galaxy. Now, even if they had the Midway Station and a ZPM, the expedition still used this method to transmit reports weekly.

Thanking Chuck, Sam noticed that Elizabeth was in her office. She hadn't seen the leader of Atlantis since the lunch they shared after the debriefing. It had been an interesting one, and she had offered to work on the readings Major Lorne's team took until the Daedalus arrived. Even though she didn't know as much as Rodney did about the Ancient technology – not to mention that she didn't possess the ATA gene – it would at least occupy her mind.

She knocked lightly on the glass wall of the office, and Elizabeth looked up, smiling when she saw who it was.

"I hope I'm not interrupting you," Sam said sitting on a chair.

"Not really," Elizabeth replied, showing the laptop screen that was displaying the game of solitaire she was playing. "Apart from this morning's debriefing, I had set aside the day to check the files we're going to send to Earth, and I was done earlier than I had thought."

"And now, you've got nothing to do."

"Well, I have requests to review and sign or deny, but from what I've seen, there's nothing that can't wait a couple of hours."

They shared a smile. Sam had no doubt that on any other day, Elizabeth would have already replied to all these requests, but she couldn't blame her for wanting a break after having spent hours going through reports. She would need one too in her place.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" Elizabeth asked.

"Actually, I was going to ask the same thing," Sam replied, smiling. "I can start working on the energy readings now if you want. I just need you to grant me access to a lab, actually."

Elizabeth was about to reply that it wasn't necessary when a crackling sound and a flash of light interrupted her.

"What the...?" Sam exclaimed, and Elizabeth had no doubt of what she had witnessed.

She turned around, and sure enough John's team and River were standing in the middle of the Gateroom. The guards had been surprised and raised their weapons, only to lower them when they saw their commanding officer.

"What was that?"

Elizabeth wasn't sure how to answer Sam's question. She wasn't even sure why the team came back using River's vortex manipulator instead of the Gate. She needed to get some questions answered herself. Leaving her office with Sam in tow, she stopped on the catwalk to look at the team.

"What happened?" she asked John.

"We were surrounded by an electrical field. There was no other choice," he said, before turning his head slightly to nod at Sam. "Colonel Carter. We should probably go to the infirmary right now, just in case."

"And I've been zapped," River said, holding up her right hand.

"Why didn't you say anything?" John exclaimed, turning towards her.

"It's really nothing," she replied with a shrug.

Elizabeth sighed; she wasn't surprised by River's reaction, far from it. And John was the last one who could say something since he was as bad as River when it came to wounds. And when she saw him open his mouth, she decided to intervene.

"Alright, go to the infirmary, we'll debrief as soon as you're released."

Elizabeth had no doubt that Sam had many questions about what had just happened, and she couldn't blame her. To be honest, she had her own questions she wanted an answer to.

She didn't know how much Sam knew about River's presence in Atlantis, or even if she knew anything at all. She knew that her reports had made it all the way to Homeworld Security and the IOA, and that General Landry had probably read them too, but she had never wondered who else could read them. Not that they would tell Sam much about River; she had kept their childhood a secret, and she had only talked about River as a woman they had first encountered on a mission, and who later came to live in Atlantis, much like Teyla and Ronon did in the past.

"Why don't we follow them to the infirmary, and I'll answer any questions you have?" Elizabeth offered. "I have my radio with me if you need to contact me," she told Chuck as they walked by his station.

"Yes, Doctor."

Sam followed Elizabeth outside of the control room and into the hallways towards the infirmary. From the corner of her eye, Elizabeth could see that the Colonel had a lot of questions, and just didn't know where to start. Knowing that she would eventually cover them all – or at the very least, the most important ones – she started to talk.

"The blonde woman you saw with the team is Doctor River Song. I don't know if you saw her name in a report..." Elizabeth trailed off, and Sam shook her head no in answer. "Well, we first encountered her and another traveller on another planet. I accompanied Colonel Sheppard's team to see ruins, and they arrived almost at the same time as we did. We ended up teaming up and I took a look at the ruins with River. Long story short, the two of us were teleported in some underground tunnels, but we managed to get out, mainly thanks to River."

She quickly passed on what had happened in the tunnels, but it just wasn't something she liked to talk about. If Sam wanted to know the rest of the story, she could read the report.

"About a month ago, River faced some troubles, and she came to live with us. I cleared it with General O'Neill and the IOA. I think that the IOA don't mind her presence because she's an archaeologist, and we could use her help in some matters, since we don't have a resident archaeologist as you know."

"I see. And how did they come back without using the Gate?"

"River has access to a technology we didn't know. She wears a vortex manipulator on her wrist that allows her to travel in space if need be."

Elizabeth didn't add that it could allow her to travel through time too; in Atlantis, only she and John knew about that, and there was no reason for her to share it, even with someone like Sam.

"It's quite useful when a team is cut off from the Gate by enemies," Sam mused out loud, already seeing what they could do with it off-world.

"I see what you mean, but River only has one, and I can't request of her to let us study it. She's our guest."

"Yes, I understand what you mean," Sam replied. "And I would never ask either. You may want to ask the team to leave it out of the report, though. Sadly, I'm quite sure the IOA would like to study it, no matter what."

"Are you asking me to tell them to falsify their mission report?" Elizabeth asked, with a raised eyebrow and a smile.

"No. Like you won't ask them either. There are things the IOA need to know, and others they really don't. This is one of the latter."

Elizabeth nodded in understanding. She also didn't trust the vortex manipulator in their hands. If they were to know that it allowed time travel, too, they would want to use it. It wouldn't matter that it could be dangerous; they wouldn't listen to her or SG1's warnings. No, there were just some things that were better kept from the IOA.

"Just like I'm certain there are things you haven't told me about River Song," Sam continued as they rounded the last corner to the infirmary. "But I trust you to have told me what is important and that the rest isn't."

Elizabeth smiled, but didn't reply anything as they entered the infirmary. There was nothing she could have said anyway: Sam was right.

They spotted the team easily at the back of the room, and walked towards them. They were all sitting on beds, and two nurses were currently with Rodney and Teyla while Carson hovered near River's bed. To their surprise, she was writing in her notebook, completely ignoring the Scottish doctor.

"Ah, Elizabeth!" Carson exclaimed when he saw her. "Can you please tell her that I really need to take a look at her injured hand?"

"And I said, I just need a minute to finish this," River replied.

"What are you writing?" Elizabeth asked.

"This text was on the pillars and the altar stone. I haven't been able to memorize everything, but this is what I remember. I thought it might be useful to know what happened, and if anything had been done to us," she added, looking at the good doctor.

"Alright, two minutes," Carson conceded. "But then, I will need to treat your wound."

River nodded without looking up from her notebook. She had already filled five pages and was well on her way to fill a sixth. She hadn't always been impressed with how much she could remember; she had only found it came in handy. When she was Mels, she hadn't used her ability for school, but to remember every single detail of Amy's stories about the Doctor. After Berlin, it had obviously changed, and she had come to really appreciate it, even though remembering everything wasn't something she would wish on anyone.

"And… done," she said, putting her pen back into her bag. "I'm all yours, Doctor Beckett," she added, showing her hand to him.

"Can I take a look in the meantime?" Sam asked, pointing to the notebook.

"Colonel Carter is an astrophysicist, too," Elizabeth explained to River. "She might be able to find out what happened."

"Go ahead, Colonel," River replied, handing Sam the notebook with her free hand.

"It's impressive how much you remembered," Sam marvelled at the pages River filled with her writing.

"It's a trait of my people," River simply said.

Sam nodded absentmindedly while skimming through the text River had transcribed. It might have been missing some parts of the text that had been written on the ruins, but the answer they were looking for was hopefully there somewhere.

"Ok, lass. The electrical field you told me about slightly burned your hand when it touched you, but it doesn't seem serious. I'm going to put some disinfectant on it and bandage your hand. How are you feeling otherwise?"

"Nothing life threatening is happening if that's what you're asking. Nothing hurts, strong heartbeat," she said, careful about dropping the plural on the last word.

"Good. Elizabeth, I'd like to keep them for a while longer, if you don't mind. They're fine, but I just want to put them through a couple more tests just to make sure."

"Do we have to?" John all but whined from the bed he was sitting on.

"Sorry, John, but Carson is the one making the decisions on this," Elizabeth answered with a smile. "Colonel Carter and I will be waiting for you in the briefing room when you're done."

"Would you mind if I hold onto this?" Sam asked River.

"Please do."

Sam thanked River and she and Elizabeth left the infirmary.

 

###

 

A couple of hours had passed before the team and Carson arrived in the control room. As they walked into the briefing room, Elizabeth noticed River's bandaged hand, but aside from this, there was nothing to indicate that the electrical field had done them any harm. Sam handed her notebook back to River as she walked past her.

"Did you find anything useful?"

"Not really, no. There's no mention about that device in the text, or at least, none that I noticed. The text is mostly a history of the people who lived on the planet."

River wasn't surprised; she hadn't been able to see anything important about the device either when she was transcribing the text from her memories. At the very least, the text would allow them to learn about a new culture of the Pegasus Galaxy, even though, from what they had been able to see, they had now disappeared.

"What about you Carson?" Elizabeth asked, turning towards the doctor. "Did you find anything suspicious with the team?"

"No. Aside from River's injury, they all appear to be unharmed. I'd suggest a daily check-up for the next week just to be sure I haven't missed anything."

"Agreed," Elizabeth replied. "Now, can you tell me what else happened on this planet?"

John started retelling the mission from the moment they walked through the Gate. The others cut in from time to time, to add a detail their leader forgot to mention. When he reached the moment they arrived at the ruins, John nodded to River to carry on.

"I scanned the ruins and didn't find any trace of energy. And neither did Doctor McKay," she added, to which the scientist nodded. "I was the first one to enter the circle. I immediately noticed the writings on the pillars and I took out my notebook to write it all down for you. That was when Doctor McKay noticed the energy levels rising."

"Yes. It appeared out of nowhere, and we were soon surrounded by an electrical field. There's no way of knowing what would have happened if we stayed there."

"It couldn't have appeared out of nowhere, McKay," Sam said. "It must have been activated in some way. Did any of you touch anything?" she asked, and everyone but River shook their head no. "Doctor Song?"

"I just… I brushed my hand against one of the pillars."

"Is this how you got injured?" Sam asked.

"No. That happened just before I teleported us back to Atlantis."

"So, River activated it?" Elizabeth asked, turning towards Sam.

"It's a possibility."

"But how? I just brushed my hand against a stone pillar."

"This is how some of the technology in the Pegasus Galaxy works", Rodney replied. "It's actually how most of the Ancient technology works."

"Yes, but with the Ancient technology, you need to have the ATA gene," Carson added. "That's the Ancient Technology Activation gene that some descendants from the Ancients have."

"And I can't have it."

"Have you tested her for the ATA gene, Doctor Beckett?" Sam asked.

"No, but it's highly unlikely that she has it."

"But you've found occurrence of the ATA gene in people of this galaxy before, if I remember well."

"Yes, but…," Carson trailed off and looked towards Elizabeth, unsure of how much he could tell Sam.

"There's one simple way to settle this," John said, getting up from his chair and leaving the room.

"Where did he go?" Sam asked, but John was already back before someone can answer her.

"Here. Can you hold this, please?" he asked River, handing her a glowing stone.

The glow the stone emitted disappeared when River took it in her hand, much to her surprise.

"See, Colonel? She doesn't have the ATA gene."

"Alright. That still doesn't explain how it was activated and what it does."

"And we may never find out," Elizabeth said. "If that's all, I'll be waiting for your mission reports by tomorrow morning. And Carson, I want daily reports about the team and River, too."

"Yes, Elizabeth."

"Alright, you're dismissed. River, John, can I see you in my office now?"

They nodded, and followed Elizabeth out of the room. Sam was walking out of the room when Rodney fell into step with her. She had known that the scientist wanted to speak with her from the moment he saw she was there, but he had held himself back until now.

"I didn't know you were supposed to come," he said.

"I wasn't, actually. But we received a message from the Daedalus. They have a problem with one of their engines and the shields that no one onboard seems to be able to fix. So here I am."

"They should be here tomorrow morning."

"That's what Doctor Weir told me when I arrived."

"If you're free, maybe you could come to the labs?"

Sam tried to think of an excuse, but she quickly realised that she really had nothing to do here until the Daedalus arrived.

"I guess I can," she finally replied.

"Good," Rodney said with a big smile. "I'm going to go change. I think you remember where the labs are," he stated more than asked, but Sam nodded nonetheless. "I'll see you there, then. Just, don't touch anything, will you?"

She had to close her eyes and take a deep breath not to yell at Rodney that she was an astrophysicist too, and she knew her way around a lab. Thankfully for him, he seemed to have picked up on how she was feeling, because when she opened her eyes, Rodney was gone.

She made her way to the labs without any hurry, all the while wondering if there was any way she could murder Rodney and get away with it.

 

###

 

"Before anything else, what is Colonel Carter doing here?" John asked, sitting in one of the chairs in front of Elizabeth's desk.

"There's something wrong with one of the engines of the Daedalus, and she offered General Landry to come take a look herself."

"Is it serious?"

"I guess we'll know when they arrive tomorrow as planned, John."

"Or if they don't," he replied. At Elizabeth's look, he continued. "I mean, if they have a problem with an engine, they might not be able to reach us."

"Well, we won't find out until tomorrow morning, will we?" Elizabeth said, putting an end to this discussion; she was worried about the Daedalus and its crew too, but there was nothing they could do at the time, anyway. "Are you sure you're ok?" she asked River.

"I am. Don't worry about me. It's just a burn, and even if I had any regeneration left, it wouldn't have triggered one."

"Alright, but if anything feels wrong…"

"I'll go see Doctor Beckett, I promise. Now, onto a more pressing matter: how much does Colonel Carter know about me?"

"Just what I told the IOA and the joint chiefs on Earth in my report. We met you during a mission about a year ago, and you've recently decided to join the expedition for a while. And we'll keep it that way."

"That's fine with me."

Elizabeth didn't feel the need to mention that Sam knew that she hadn't been told everything about River. It wouldn't change anything in the end.

"So now, can I ask how you were able to read the text when it wasn't in English in the first place?" John said, turning in his chair to look at River. "It couldn't have been the… what was it again?"

"The TARDIS translation matrix," Elizabeth supplied for him.

"Yes, that. I know I haven't seen a single word in English for my part."

"Actually, it was the matrix. When you travel long enough in the TARDIS, even though she and the Doctor aren't anywhere close to you, you can still translate. It came in handy in the past, and today even more so."

"But still, there wasn't anything in what you transcribed that told us what the device you activated was," Elizabeth said.

"I haven't been able to memorize all the writings, so there might still be something there."

"I refuse to send another team to this planet until we know it's not dangerous."

"And we might not know that unless you let us go back," River replied.

"Look, I understand what you mean," John started, "but I have to side with Elizabeth on this. We were trapped, and if it hadn't been for you and your vortex manipulator, god knows what would have happened to us."

"I'm going to take a look at the database to see if I can find anything about this planet," Elizabeth added. "I'm not saying I'm black-listing this planet. I just need to make sure I won't put my people in danger. And you're one of them too," she added when she saw that River was about to protest.

"I understand," River finally said. "I'd like to take a look at my notes, if you don't mind. I didn't really pay attention when I wrote it all down," she said, getting up from her chair. "I'll see you for dinner?"

"Of course."

Elizabeth watched as River left her office. She didn't know what, but she had the nagging feeling that she was missing something. River was right when she said that the answers to their questions were probably on that planet, but there were too many unknowns. At least, her old friend had seemed to understand her point of view in the end. Or at least, she hoped so.

She had found out that sometimes, it was hard to tell with River. Elizabeth knew that she had been taught to hide her feelings, if not to suppress her feelings, and there are times when she noticed that River was still hiding herself behind the wall she had so carefuly built. Just like that night when she first arrived a bit more than a month before: even though there had been cracks in her wall allowing Elizabeth to see that something was wrong, River had mostly hidden her feelings from her.

"Elizabeth?" John called, jolting her out of her thoughts. "Is there something bothering you?"

"Yes... No... I don't really know, John," Elizabeth sighed.

"Does it have to do with River?"

"Maybe. Look, it's probably nothing. Why don't you go write your mission report so that you can hand it to me on time?" she suggested, changing the subject.

"Are you throwing me out of your office?"

"If you want to see it that way."

"And what other way should I see it?"

"Just think that if you're done with your report by dinnertime, your evening will be free for other things."

She wasn't one to even imply something like this usually, but she felt like teasing him today. He raised an eyebrow at the implied meaning and smiled, seeing the virtue of being done early for once.

Once John had left her office, Elizabeth leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms. Her mind went back to River, and she resolved to talk to her tonight during dinner.

 

###

 

The door of the quarters closed behind River, shutting her off from the rest of Atlantis. Her mind was made up, and while she knew Elizabeth wouldn't be too happy with her, she also knew that she was the only one able to bring her answers at the moment. And she planned to be back before anyone could notice that she was gone.

Taking her weapon and its holster out of her bag, she placed it at her hip. She hadn't gone to the locker room to get a vest; it would have appeared weird and people would have probably reported her to Elizabeth, and it was the last thing she wanted. And anyway, the planet had been peaceful when they were there earlier that day, and she counted on it to still be that way.

She entered the coordinates into her vortex manipulator, and pressed the button.

A crackle of electricity later, she was back on the planet, just outside the ruins. The electric field had disappeared, but she still took out her scanner to check it. Just like when they had first arrived, the stones weren't emitting any energy. Wanting to keep it that way for the time being, she chose to walk the perimeter. There were some writings on this side of the pillars, and she wrote everything down in her notebook. Like with the text she had already transcribed, it was mostly about the people living on this planet.

Some parts of the text were covered by moss, but she decided to leave it there. Even if it might have been safe to remove it with her tools, she chose to be cautious for once. She would be very unlucky if the only important parts of the text were the ones hidden by moss.

She reached the bottom of the last pillars, and still the text was a detailed history of the people of the planet. This only left her with the writings inside the circle of pillars. She hadn't been able to memorize everything before they had to leave rather abruptly. She hesitated briefly before stepping inside the circle; for all she knew, the energy levels could start rising the moment she stepped inside, and she would be in danger.

But she was River Song, and she hadn't been taught to run away from danger. If anything, her husband had taught her to run straight at it. And really, if need be, she could always teleport herself back to Atlantis with her vortex manipulator.

Smiling to herself, she took a step forward. She looked around, but nothing seemed to happen for the time being. Reassured that she would at least have some time to transcribe the text, she walked to the altar stone. She had noticed the writings on it when she was here before, but she hadn't had time to read the text.

After a few words, she realised that her trip here wouldn't be a complete waste of time; this part of the text was clearly about the purpose of this place. She made sure to transcribe every word; Elizabeth would be mad at her when she revealed that she came back, but maybe the fact that she had found something useful for her people would attenuate it. The text wasn't mentioning that there was a hidden device inside the ruins, but it was talking about something changing.

"' _The gift brought by the unwelcome change had to be treasured by all_ '," River read the last sentence she had copied down. "Well, that's cryptic."

She finished copying down the rest of the text that was on the altar stone, but the meaning was still unclear to her; maybe it would mean something to Elizabeth. She took another look at the text on the pillars, but there was nothing more about this 'unwelcome change'. She looked down at the half page she had filled with the text: it wasn't much, but at least, it was something.

Still careful not to touch the stones, she left the circle. She was confident that she hadn't missed anything this time. She entered the coordinates to her room in Atlantis in her vortex manipulator and pressed the button.

Once back in her room, her eyes went to the window. The sun was slowly setting, but she still a good half hour to take a quick shower and change her clothes before she had to join Elizabeth and John in the mess hall for dinner.

 

###

 

If there was one thing she was missing, River thought as she stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around her body, that was her big bathroom aboard the TARDIS. While this bathroom wasn't tiny per se, it was smaller than the one she had on the ship. It also missed some of the appliances she had grown used to, like the hair dryer the TARDIS had provided her. She had to resolve to use the small one that she had found in her dimensionally transcendental bag. The shower stall was good, but she also missed the huge bathtub that allowed for recreational activities with her husband.

And alright, if she was honest at least with herself, maybe it was the Doctor she really missed. It wasn't the first time they had spent time apart – she had sometimes gone years without seeing him – but now that she had been able to properly mourn her parents, she realised that she couldn't hide any longer. It would soon be time for her to close this interlude and go back to her life.

She knew she still had to write the book, Melody Malone, but she hadn't found the willpower yet to revisit the hours when she lost her parents. She wished she didn't have to write it, but if she didn't, time would be rewritten, and her father might spend the rest of his life without her mother. And that shouldn't happen.

But as well as she couldn't write it on the TARDIS, she couldn't write it here. When the TARDIS carried memories of the four of them together, Atlantis had become her refuge, and she didn't want to taint it with the sadness that would inevitably come with writing the book. It would have to wait a little more, until she was back at her house.

Smiling at her reflection in the mirror, she ran her fingers through her wet hair. She didn't have time to blow-dry it now; she lingered in her thoughts a little too long, and if she didn't hurry up, she would be late. As it was, by the time she put on some clothes, and was out of the door, she was already a couple of minutes late. It wouldn't worry Elizabeth, but she might ask questions as she was always right on time.

She was rounding the last corner to the mess hall when she was caught in a dizzy spell. She had to lean against the wall and close her eyes to stop it. Something felt wrong; she couldn't say what exactly, but there was something going on.

She heard footsteps coming her way, and she wanted to move, but she couldn't. She could barely open her eyes as it was.

"River?" she heard Elizabeth's voice say.

As luck would have it, it was Elizabeth and John's footsteps that she had heard. She turned around to look at them, her back still resting against the wall.

"Are you alright?" John asked as they stepped closer to her.

She was about to shake her head no when she felt a lightening pain in the right side of her chest. She cried out, crumbling down to her knees. Something was very wrong indeed.

She heard Elizabeth shout her name, and felt her hands on her, and for a moment, she was brought back to that warehouse, when they were children. The last thing she heard before blackness engulfed her was John calling for a medical team.

 

###

 

River woke up when they transferred her from the gurney to a bed. She groaned as she was once more aware of the pain that was tightening her chest. She opened her eyes to find herself surrounded by two nurses and Carson giving them instructions. Elizabeth and John were hovering nearby, and she smiled to reassure them but she knew she failed when the worry didn't disappear from their faces.

"Hey there, love," Carson said prompting her to return her eyes on him. "Glad to have you back with us."

"There's something wrong," she managed to say. "Only one heart."

"You're telling me only one of your hearts is beating," Carson repeated, wanting to be sure he understood her right.

She nodded. River was glad that when she had first decided to stay Elizabeth had insisted that she told the doctor of her – almost – unique physiology. It meant that she didn't have to explain everything to him now and she could focus on her breathing.

"Carson, does it have anything to do with what happened during the mission?"

"I don't know," he answered Elizabeth's question. "Maybe."

"Elizabeth's right," River said. "I... I went back," she admitted.

"You what?" Elizabeth replied, stepping closer to the bed. "When? And how?" she asked, but before River could answer, she continued. "You used the vortex manipulator."

"I had to find answers, you need them," River said, even though she knew Elizabeth wouldn't like this answer.

"I don't need answers as much as I need you to be fine."

"I found something," River continued. "There was... something about the device on the altar stone. It's all in my notebook."

Elizabeth signalled John to go get it, hoping that Carson would be able to use the notes to help River.

She was having more and more difficulty breathing, something that everyone could see.

"Your sats are down to 93," Carson said, and River knew that while it wasn't dangerous yet, it wasn't good. "I don't want to have to intubate you just yet, mainly because I don't know whether it's going to help you. Hopefully, this oxygen mask will be enough until we find what's wrong with you."

Carson placed the oxygen mask on her mouth as he said that. River knew what was wrong, and she knew how to remedy it; she just had to convince the good doctor to get along with it.

She took a couple of deep breaths before pulling the mask away from her face.

"You need to shock me with the defibrillator," she said before he could put the mask back in place.

"What? That is crazy."

"It can work. Mom did it to the Doctor once. Trust me." When she saw she wouldn't be able to convince Carson, she looked past him and at Elizabeth. "Please, trust me."

Elizabeth hesitated for a few seconds, but she finally nodded at the doctor to do as River asked. Carson still wasn't convinced but he left to go get the defibrillator. Elizabeth stepped closer to the bed, and took River's hand in hers.

"Don't you dare die on me again," she said, before leaning down to kiss her forehead.

"I'll try my best, Bessie," River returned, knowing better than to make any promise.

Neither of them noticed that Sam had entered the infirmary and witnessed the last exchange, with a curious look on her face. She cleared her throat, and the two women's eyes fell on her.

"I ran into Colonel Sheppard and he told me what was happening. You went back against orders?" she said, looking straight at River.

"I've never been good at following orders. I must have gotten that from my mother."

Before Sam could say anything else, Carson came back with the crash cart. He still looked unsure of River's decision, and his next words confirmed it.

"Do you really want this?" he asked her and she nodded. "Alright, but we'll try this only once. If it doesn't work, we'll find another way. Elizabeth, you have to step back."

Elizabeth nodded and went to stand beside Sam. She could feel that the Colonel had a lot of questions, and she wasn't sure she wanted to answer them all. And anyway, now wasn't the time to answer them. Her focus was solely on River as Carson prepared her for the defibrillation.

Carson took the paddles and approached River's bed. The nurse declared the defibrillator as charged, but he still didn't make a move. It wasn't until River nodded that he finally placed the paddles on the right side of her chest to Sam's surprise.

Elizabeth startled when River's body arched on the bed and she groaned in pain. She fell back on the bed panting and shaking her head.

"Didn't work," she managed to croak before the nurse placed the oxygen mask back on her mouth.

"Alright. Let's get you to the scanner. And Elizabeth," he said as the nurses took River away and she was about to follow, "I want Colonel Sheppard's team in the infirmary under constant surveillance."

Elizabeth nodded and immediately radioed Rodney, Teyla and Ronon. If the scientist protested at first, when she told him of River's condition, he agreed to come down without wasting time. She didn't bother radioing John as he would soon be back from River's quarters with her notebook and, hopefully, some answers.

"I think we need to talk," Sam said as she fell into step with Elizabeth when she walked towards the scanner.

"Yes. But not now, please."

"I understand."

From where she was lying under the scanner, River saw Elizabeth and Sam approach. She had no doubt that the Colonel would soon find out everything there was to know about her. At a time like this, it was impossible to keep a secret.

John entered the infirmary, quickly followed by the rest of his team, and after having given the notebook to Elizabeth, he was ushered towards a bed. River could see the worry on her friend's face as she followed him with her eyes. She felt guilty for having put them in such a situation and could only hope that her notes would help.

She closed her eyes as the green light of the scanner started moving up her body. She didn't know what the scanner would find, but she had no doubt that it wouldn't be good news. Even with the oxygen mask, she still had trouble breathing, and her sats had dropped slightly lower. Any lower, and Carson would have no choice but to intubate her, and she didn't know the consequences it could have on her respiratory bypass system.

Her only working heart was also beating faster, trying to compensate for its twin, but she knew it could only last so long. Her body wasn't used to have only one beating heart, and she had no doubt that it would shut down in a few hours, unless they could restart her other heart.

Her mind went back to the defibrillation shock she had just received. It should have worked, and she had no idea why it didn't. What also worried her was that her respiratory bypass system should have already kicked in, and it hadn't. It was like something was preventing it from working.

She would soon have answers; the scan was complete, and now Carson was studying the results. She tried to sit up in bed, but fell back. She groaned, hating having to lie down. Seeing this, Elizabeth and Sam stepped forward, and they each took one of her arms and helped her sit up. Even though she knew Carson would frown at it, River insisted to sit on the edge of the bed.

Elizabeth and Sam stayed on each side of her to support her. If River understood Elizabeth's presence, Sam's was more surprising; she could easily have let a nurse take her place, but she hadn't hesitated one second to do it. She had never seen this woman until a couple of hours ago, but she was still there for her in a moment of need. River couldn't help but wonder why.

She turned her head slightly towards Sam, and saw that she had been looking at her. River saw curiosity in the other woman's eyes, which wasn't surprising, but she also saw compassion. That surprised her greatly, but before she could think about it any further, Carson exclaimed.

"I'll be damned."

"What is it, Carson?" Elizabeth asked, worried and tightening her hold on River.

"I've compared the scans I just took to the one I took during your post-mission check-up and…"

"And?" River prompted when the doctor made no sign of continuing.

Instead of replying, he turned the screen towards her so she could see what he meant. The differences between the two scans were easy to spot, even for someone without a medical degree.

"Only one heart," she whispered, taking off the oxygen mask and throwing it behind her on the bed before anybody could react. "No respiratory bypass system. No wonder it hadn't kicked in," she added as an afterthought.

Even though Sam didn't immediately understand what River meant, when she looked at the scan, she noticed that her internal organs had changed in a matter of hours. River had had two hearts – and Sam tried not to think about that at the moment – when the first scan had been taken, but she only had one now.

"What's happening to her, Carson?" Elizabeth asked.

"Her body is changing, but I can't tell what's causing it."

"The device hidden in the ruins," River said, having no doubt that the answer was there. "The text I transcribed talked about change."

She reached for her notebook on Elizabeth's lap and started flipping through the pages, looking for the one where she had transcribed the text from the altar stone. Once she found it, she handed the notebook back to Elizabeth who started reading it.

"This could be the answer, indeed," she said, when she reached the last line. "The text is about a change that must occur to protect the people of this planet. It's not said whether this change happens in a human body, but it could very well be it."

"Alright. Let's get you back to bed, and I'm going to take scans of Colonel Sheppard's team to see how far along these changes are in their bodies. But we need to find a way to reverse these changes, Elizabeth," he said, and the Lantean leader nodded.

The nurses wanted River to get on the gurney so that they could take her back to her bed, but she refused. She'd rather walk there with Elizabeth and Sam's help if she needed it. Before getting up though, she took one last look at the images from the scan.

"You can go see John, if you want to," River told Elizabeth, who looked at him walking towards the scanner.

"I'll stay with you for the moment. He'll understand."

River smiled and sat up on the bed she had been occupying earlier. The nurse handed her the oxygen mask, but she shook her head no.

"It won't change anything," she told her. My sats are low because my only heart can't pump enough oxygen in my veins, even though it already beats faster than usual. Giving me oxygen could help, but only for a little while," she explained, and the nurse nodded but she still went to Carson to get her orders. "And anyway, it's only a matter of time before…"

"Before what, River?" Elizabeth asked when she saw that her friend wouldn't continue.

But River couldn't answer that question. She didn't want to see the look on Elizabeth's face when she was going to tell her that if they couldn't reverse the changes, she only had a few hours left to live. It was a situation they were going to face soon, but just not now. If she had been the only one affected by these changes, maybe it would be easier to tell Elizabeth the truth. But as far as River knew, John's team, the man she loved and the people Elizabeth was the closest to in the City, would soon be in the same situation as her.

In a matter of hours, Elizabeth could lose the people who mattered the most to her, and River refused to tell her that for the moment.

"What did you see when you looked at the scan?" Sam asked, interrupting River's thoughts. "And I mean just before we walked back here," she added.

"As far as I can tell, my brain wave patterns are still the same, which is good news for now. But I have no doubt they will soon start to change."

"And what would happen, then?" Elizabeth asked.

"My brain will overload."

Even though her mind didn't hold half the knowledge the Doctor's did, being the Child of the TARDIS meant her brain was the same as his. One slight change in her brain wave patterns and she would be in the same situation Donna Noble had been after the metacrisis. But the Doctor wouldn't be here to help her, and even if he was, she wasn't sure he could. Unlike Donna, she hadn't just picked up this knowledge one day: it had been there since the day she was born.

Neither Elizabeth nor Sam said anything after River had spoken. They had chosen to read the text again, hoping to find answers in it. River knew it was a waste of time; there wasn't anything in there explaining how to reverse the effects. And as far as she saw, it hadn't been written anywhere else in the ruins either. They were on their own to figure it out.

"What do you think the purpose of this device is?" Elizabeth asked Sam. "Why change the human body?"

"I don’t know. Was there anything about this planet in the database?" she asked, remembering that Elizabeth had said she would check it.

"No. I couldn't find anything about it aside from the address."

"What about the rest of the text?" Sam asked, turning towards River who was watching the exchange. "Was there anything in it about why the people left the planet?"

"Actually, no," River replied, and come to think about it, it was quite strange. "There are writings on every pillar and the altar stone, but the history seems to predate the creation of this circle."

"The Wraith may have culled them all," Elizabeth replied, even though she wasn't convinced it was the right answer.

"Well, whatever happened to them, we might never find out," Sam said.

"But we still need to find out what is causing the changes in their bodies," Elizabeth said, thinking about the team undergoing another scan at the moment.

"They're not affected," Carson said before Sam could say anything else. He was walking towards them with John and his team following. "Colonel Sheppard's team, I mean. Their scans are completely normal. There's no difference I can see between the scans I took now, and the ones from earlier."

"How is that possible?" Elizabeth asked, as John stopped beside her, and took her hand in his, a rare public display of affection for them.

"I don't know. Their scans are clear right now, but I'm still keeping them under observation for the night."

"Can River going back to the planet could have accelerated the process?" Sam asked.

"No," River said. "They have human DNA and I don't."

"I should be affected too," Teyla intervened. "I have Wraith DNA."

"You have trace amounts of Wraith DNA, while River's DNA is completely different from ours," Carson replied. "But yes, you're probably right, lass. The fact that you don't have a human DNA might be the answer we were looking for, here."

"So now, what can we do?" Elizabeth asked.

When Carson didn't answer immediately, she understood that he still didn't know how to help River. They were back at square one. She should be reassured that only River had been affected by the device, but it was quite the contrary; they still didn't know how to reverse the changes.

"We should take a team back to the planet," Ronon said. "Maybe we missed something."

Elizabeth and John looked at each other, silently communicating. Her mind was already made up, but she wanted to be sure that John was agreeing with her. When she saw in his eyes that he did, she turned towards the other three members of the team.

"Rodney, I want you to work with Carson to find a way to slow down the changes, if we can't stop them. Could you help them Colonel Carter?"

"Of course."

"Ronon, Teyla, you two are going back to the ruins. I'm going to radio Major Lorne's team to join you in the Gateroom."

Ronon and Teyla were about to walk towards the door, when River's voice stopped them.

"Wait. It'll be too long if you walk there, and I'm not…"

"Don't think like that," Elizabeth said, interrupting her.

"You know I'm right. Take this," she said, taking the vortex manipulator off her wrist. She pressed a few buttons before handing it to Teyla. "Just press this button to teleport to the planet. This one will take you back here."

"I'll take good care of it, I promise," Teyla replied, smiling at River, and squeezed her hand with her free one.

They all left, until only Elizabeth and John stayed with River.

"You should go eat something and get some rest," River said, not wanting them to stay here watching her when they could do something else.

"Don't worry about us. And I'm not hungry, anyway."

"Elizabeth…"

"I'm going to get us something to eat," John said, knowing that neither of the women would back down. "Do you want anything?" he asked River.

"Thank you, but no. I don't feel like eating right now."

"Ok. I'll be back in a few," he told them, squeezing Elizabeth's hand one last time before releasing it.

When he was gone, Elizabeth brought a chair to River's bed and sat down. She took her hand in both of hers and brought it to her lips before resting her chin against them.

"What's going on in that head of yours?" River asked, seeing that something was bothering Elizabeth.

"I feel responsible."

"About what? You had no idea what would happen on that planet."

"But I convinced you to stay."

"I stayed because I wanted to. And anyway, trouble has a way of finding us Ponds. Have I ever told you about the times my father died?"

"'Times'? As in…"

"More than once. Oh yes," she said with a smile, before starting to tell Elizabeth about the first time Rory had died.

 

###

 

They had been working non-stop for about two hours, and Carson needed a break. They were still no closer to a solution. They had searched the database, but it seemed that the Ancients had never seen something like that before, or at least, they hadn't left any file about it behind.

John had been by earlier to bring them dinner as neither of them ate, but it had been left untouched on his desk. Carson looked at Sam and Rodney and noticed that they looked as tired as he was feeling. They all needed a break and to eat something, especially if they were to continue like this for most of the night.

"Alright, let's stop for a moment and eat," he said, getting Sam and Rodney's attention.

They nodded and the three of them sat at the desk and started to eat the sandwiches John had brought them from the mess hall. Under Sam and Carson's watchful eyes, Rodney was wolfing down his food. If the doctor had been surprised not to hear his friend complain before, he realised now that Rodney had just been too focused on the problem at hand to think about anything else.

"Ronon and Teyla aren't back yet?" Rodney asked with his mouth full.

"I don't think so," Carson replied. "They must still be searching for a way to reverse the process."

"Do you think they'll find something?"

"Did you see anything else besides the ruins when you were there?" Sam replied to Rodney's question. When he answered negatively, she continued. "Then, I think it's on us."

They continued to eat in silence, until they were interrupted by a nurse opening the door.

"Doctor, it's River Song."

She didn't need to say more; they were already on their feet and running through the door.

"She closed her eyes and I can't wake her up," Elizabeth said when she saw them.

"River," Carson said, taking hold of her hand and squeezing it. "Come on, lass, wake up."

"It must have spread to her brain," Sam realised.

"Yes, quite probably. River, try waking up for us, please," he still tried, not wanting to give up just yet.

She seemed to finally react to his orders when he saw her mouth opening slightly, her lips forming a word. He leaned down, trying to hear what she was saying.

"What did she say, Carson?" Elizabeth asked.

"'Doctor'," he answered, turning towards her.

Sam was about to ask what it meant when a strange noise filled the room and papers starting to fly around. She turned her head towards the sound, and she saw a blue Police Box slowly materializing before her eyes. No one seemed to react as if it was a threat, and she wondered if she should sound the alarm when the door opened.

"Alright, don’t get angry, I'm going but I…"

The Doctor stopped when he saw that he wasn't alone. In fact, he knew a couple of these people already. He wondered why the TARDIS took him to Atlantis when he saw River lying on the bed, pale and lifeless.

"River!" he exclaimed, running towards her, and pushing Carson out of the way; he would apologize later. "What happened?" he asked, keeping his eyes and hands on River.

"Her body is undergoing some changes," Carson replied. "She doesn't have a respiratory bypass system anymore and she has only one heart. It seems to have spread to her brain, now."

"She's not supposed to have only one heart," he said forcefully; again, apologies would be for later.

"We know. But we haven't been able to reverse the changes yet. She doesn't…," he trailed off, unable to find the words.

The Doctor nodded; Carson didn't need to finish this sentence for him to know. River didn't have much time left. The TARDIS brought him here because she felt that her child was dying. He sent a thankful thought to his ship, before focusing back on River. She might be dying, but she wasn't dead yet. She might slap him into his next regeneration later, but he couldn't just do nothing and watch her die.

He did it once, and he intended to do it again.

"Step back everyone," he said, but he didn't turn to check if they did.

He cupped River's face in his hands, and let the regeneration energy flow through him and inside her. She gasped and opened her eyes.

"No, don't…"

"Shh…"

Around them, the Lanteans were observing the scene. The golden light emanating from the Doctor's hands soon surrounded them completely, blinding the other people in the room.

As fast as it had appeared, the light faded away, allowing them to see the couple once more. The Doctor sat back, releasing River's face, and she sat up on the bed. Elizabeth wanted to go to her, but she knew that look on her face and she decided against interrupting them.

"You're going to slap me, aren't you?" the Doctor said, already mentally preparing himself for it.

"I should! You gave up an entire regeneration for me!"

"And you gave up _all_ your regenerations for me in Berlin."

"It's not the same, I had killed you!" she retorted, pushing the covers off her legs and getting up.

"What do you think I should have done? Leave you to die?"

He stood up from the bed in frustration; she seemed to be able to provoke this feeling in him quite often. They were now facing each other, with only the bed separating them.

"You're my wife, River, I'll always want to save you."

She sighed; she had expected him to say that.

"You can't always be there to catch me when I fall."

"I can try," he replied with a small smile and she couldn't help but return it. "Now, do I get a proper hello?"

"Hello Sweetie," she said, walking around the bed. She straightened his bowtie and rested a hand on his shoulder. "You have a new coat."

"I needed a change. When are we?"

"It's been a month since I left the TARDIS."

She didn't need to say more than this for him to understand. He cupped her face in his hands once more and leaned down to kiss her. Her hands fisted in his coat as the first kiss turned into a second and then a third. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead against hers, and she knew without him saying a word that he wouldn't stay.

"You've found a new mystery, haven't you?" she stated more than asked.

"Yes."

"Then, you should go, my love. We'll catch up another time."

"Come with me."

"Not now. I'm not quite done yet."

He kissed her lips one more time before stepping away from her, and turning towards the small crowd of people.

"Well, it was nice seeing you again," he said, clapping his hands together. "Or meeting you," he added when he saw Sam. He opened the door of the TARDIS and turned back towards River. "See you soon, honey."

"Until next time, Doctor."

The door closed behind him and the TARDIS dematerialized before their eyes. Knowing that there were a few things she needed to say, and that she should respect a certain order, River turned first towards Carson.

"My mind is great, I have two hearts once again and a respiratory bypass system in working order as you could see." He nodded at her, and she turned next to Sam. "We need to talk, but it's getting late, and I think it can wait until tomorrow. And finally..."

She trailed off, choosing to walk towards Elizabeth and pull her into her hug instead of using words to reassure her. Elizabeth wrapped her arms tightly around River, and they stayed like this for a couple of minutes, neither wanting to let go.

Finally, it was Elizabeth who pulled away first.

"Never do that again," she said.

"I'll try my best."

 

Fin.


End file.
